FTB - Cardiac Edition
by PPP on Oct 30, 2008 9:47 AM EDT
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PrintRemember when Ron Wilson called the Leafs' the Yankees of hockey and Dave Feschuk pretended to be so dumb as to misunderstand the financial comparisons and freaked out? Well, the Leafs are the Yankees of hockey. Congrats to Lynn Zinser for researching how to write a proper article on the Leafs. When you get a bit better you learn how to sneak in 1967 later on in the article to surprise us. Speaking of the sport I loathe: It's over! Hooray for Matt Stairs and for four months free of 800 games worth of highlights every damn day.
- Steve looks at how awesome the top line has been and suggests that maybe Antro and Poni were carrying Sundin (just kidding). Also, 18th ranked PK and 6th ranked PP? Who says you can't make lemonade out of 'lemons'? Coaching: It doesn't matter does it Howie?. Dumbass.
- Godd Till finds a research study that explains The Omen.
- Speaking of stupid people, remember when Cox dismissed Wilson's start after 8 games because it wasn't as good as Maurice's? Well two games later it is just as good as his inaugural year.
- DGB notes two essential truths about this year's Leafs team. Even The Pensblog noted the second truth.
- I missed this yesterday but Jared had another visit from himself.
- Everyone's favourite British sportswriter is back. At least he is admitting that he is writing about the Leafs because he gets reactions.
- Eyebeleaf is heating up some crow.
- Oh yeah, for the gooners, I turned off the game to do a presentation in the 88th minute how about you? And who is that at the top of the table?
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I was almost not going to post this after what happened last time
But Ian Winwood is back on the beat.
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
Actually...
I liked it. The Brits do self-deprecating humour very well and I agreed with some of his arguments.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
The real question
Is how he got hold of a picture of Chemmy….
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
Probably
facestalkerbook
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
I loved this...
sample response: “Nice work Ian, I look forward to more lazily composed [articles]…”
The Guardian quoted DGB!
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
That was actually mf37.
Down Goes Brown - Because it's technically possible that things may get better before we all die.
by Down Goes Brown on Oct 30, 2008 11:57 AM EDT up reply actions
Whoops
Well, it’s the Barilkosphere. We’re international!
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
If you strike me down now....
To be perfectly honest, if you had posted the FTB, I would have said PPP instead. Loser Domi at a push.
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
You would have been wrong. That is a young Chemmy. I am much cuter.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Of course.
That’s the only reason I hang around here!
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
He's man enough for...
…actually no, let’s stop all this beautiful madness now.
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
Well, Chemmy’s engaged, but as far as I know PPP is still on the market..*
*—stalkerbook was unable to confirm or deny this statement
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
you mean happy, right?
Right?
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:48 AM EDT up reply actions
beans are the musical fruit you know
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions
did you just tell a fart joke?
/mock shock
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
well I couldn’t think of an appropriate dick joke
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
franks and beans?
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
great, now im hungry
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions
it’s always lunch time
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
i'm still hungry
after lunch
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
piss and vinigar….mostly piss
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:51 AM EDT up reply actions
“hey guy, were gonna hafta do this later, but could you do me one little favour?… could you have a great day? could you do that for me?… thanks.”
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
“I woke up with a clown’s hand…in my pants. That’s, that’s what I did today”
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
whispers
lots of cocain
/rock and roll clown’d
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions
“they banned my video because you could totally see my junk”
“seriously man, a LOT of cocaine”
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
Wowie!
/toki’d
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:03 PM EDT up reply actions
I’ve made friends with an old man who’s sitting on two duffel bags..
freeballin’
by LeafFanInVan on Oct 30, 2008 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions
But
some of them were terrible. MLSE ‘ruthlessly self-interested’? Well, they are a for-profit corporation.
And I don’t think MLSE has expressed any approval, muted or otherwise, for the idea.
I have heard no one say the playoffs should be expanded.
No one’s said it in connection with expansion but I do recall there being an article about expanding it now to include a 7-10 and 8-9 round. I think it’s fair to suggest that the league would think about it as part of expansion.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
he was better in Traffic…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:11 AM EDT up reply actions
Cox's
Latest drivel was gushing all over Hagman, who deserves it while Stajan gets about a paragraph, and Coxie still thinks that while now may not be the best time for Stajan to be given the C, as far as he’s concerned, he has demonstrated the most leadership on the team this season.
In other news, McGuire was dry humping Stajan again all last night, and the kid actually deserved it this time!
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
are we sure it was dry?
i mean, that camera only focuses on from the waist up, he may have had his pants off…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 10:25 AM EDT up reply actions
Not sure
I was too busy trying to gouge out eyes out with ice cream scoopers
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
I thought
We just called that alcohol?
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
Not 100% effective. As I know to my bitter, painful cost.
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
obviously
you’re doing it wrong…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 10:52 AM EDT up reply actions
A bacon vodka Ceaser sounds absolutly amazing
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:09 AM EDT up reply actions
ya know
it does…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions
bacon vodka ceaser
holy crap I need to do that. Among the only things I ever seem on a Martha Stewart show that I could actually attempt was the time she made pepper vodka. now THAT would be great.
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
like how jared spelled it?
Si
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:41 AM EDT up reply actions
psssh, no, we spell it right!
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:41 AM EDT up reply actions
you can
tell us how to spell words when you wear the spam crown
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
glove slap
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:02 PM EDT up reply actions
What's with the
damn pop-ups that don’t have close tabs? Now that the Leafs are a cup contender are you selling out and letting ads take over the site. I remember the good old days when eveyone here was so humble…..(yesterday)
NO!
It’s a network-wide issue that they are trying to fix because the ads are not meant to be a pain in the ass. If you wouldn’t mind, take a screenshot and send it along with details (browser, url you were on, etc) to support@sbnation.com so that they can fix the problem.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Uh oh
Leafs winning broke SB Nation.
People, get Firefox and install adblock, it’s like the Luke Schenn for web browsers
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
The pop up eraser!
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
Deep Thoughts
Ponikarovsky is leading the team in scoring, my friends. It’s a beautiful day to be alive.
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
obviously
it’s time to trade him know, while his value is high. Poni for Kovalchuk, straight up… :P
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 10:45 AM EDT up reply actions
Get out
Damien Cox!
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
seriously
if Cox ever wrote that, i would die from laughter. i like poni, but straight across for Kovalchuk? that’s why i love the hockeybuzz message boards. it’s a guilty pleasure of mine to read the ridiculous drivel that spills forth over there…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 10:51 AM EDT up reply actions
Yeah
If the day is really slow I liked to see people argue themselves into pretzels about how Dominic Moore could be the key to getting Gaborik.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
the trades you see on there, you can’t even make work on NHL09. It’s insanity, like a Monty Python sketch on sports fandom…beyond ridiculous.
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:02 AM EDT up reply actions
I think in NHL 2002
I somehow convinced the computer to take Reichel for Heatley… I was never able to replicate that, so it was most likely a glitch
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
Where is my good friend
tank nation to rip on Ponikarovsky now?
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
I have visions of a ‘Manhunter’-style pit….
A Loony Room, if you will. Starring Jodie Foster.
If it's after midnight, it must be time for hockey!
thanks
my co-workers want to know what’s so funny now. Had I been drinking milk, I would have sprayed it out my nose all over the monitor…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:10 AM EDT up reply actions
better than my timmies, I am mourning the loss of that mouth full of delicious crack in a cup.
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:12 AM EDT up reply actions
Lost in the Shuffle
I’m surprised no one has mentioned Kabby’s shootout goal, getting Brodeur to move sideways then picking the 5-hole like that was a thing of brilliance.
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:17 AM EDT reply actions
somehow
i knew he had him beat. I was yelling at the TV “COME ON KABBY!” I think he heard me…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions
He has you
in his heart
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
You are the wind beneath his wings!
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:21 AM EDT up reply actions
are you saying...
I complete him?
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:36 AM EDT up reply actions
this looks like
the beautiful beginning for a slash fic for LD
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
There are so many ways to go, I just don’t know where to start…three stooges mode…DICK JOKES!!
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
i dunno
although I’d be happy to claim Kabby’s heart as my own, I think he really holds us all in there. It’s what keeps his cheeks so red…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions
thats because
he uses Gillette, shave gel, the best a man can get.
Side effects may include rosy cheeks.
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions
his cheeks can fuel sweet coco parties
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:50 AM EDT up reply actions
Kabby
Wins at Offensive Rushes, tape to tape passes and Looking like Ray Romano!
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:53 AM EDT up reply actions
no joke
there was a guy last year I kept seeing at the library that looked JUST LIKE Kaberle. I felt so terrible for this guy since wherever i saw him I’d just gawk and then pretend I wasn’t looking
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
maybe
he thought you wuz stalkering him?
What guy wouldn’t want to be stalkered by LD?
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
Well, he wasn’t getting stalked by LD, just my less cool, real life alter ego.
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
I fail
to see your point
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
for the record, I am much better looking in real life, I look nothing like a bunch of text thrown together for comedic purposes
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:00 PM EDT up reply actions
heart...
broken, reality, shattered.
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 12:04 PM EDT up reply actions
well, being in Quebec as I am, he probably wouldn’t be thrilled at me being interested in him because of his resemblance to a defense man for the Maple Leafs.
Then again, this place is sorta known as “little Toronto” so what do I know?
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
he’s probably a Habs spy surgically altered to look like Kabby and replace him and gather valuble leaf secrets, the reason he was in the Library was so he could learn Czec!
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:04 PM EDT up reply actions
LD
he’s more than just a “defence man for the Maple Leafs.”
He’s Tomas Kaberle. The greatest defenceman in the league. He make cross ice pass like you won’t believe…
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
even though he doesn’t look every mean…
well, Library Kabbie wasn’t as big as real Kabby, but the face was spot. ON.
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
hairless...
and flushed?
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 12:06 PM EDT up reply actions
next comes the steroides and high increasing surguries, those quebequois are tricky and evil i tells ya
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:07 PM EDT up reply actions
I haven’t even seen him around, so I think he’s gone now. I think I scared him away from this school. :(
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
He’ll be back, his first mission will to be to try and infiltrate Leafs nation, through its fans, You might be first in line LD
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:10 PM EDT up reply actions
infiltrate
giggity
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
aaaaaaallll riiiiiight
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:28 PM EDT up reply actions
I think my reverse jinx worked, check the game day thread.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
surprised no one has mentioned Kabby’s shootout goal
I mentioned it. Ten minutes after you said that – but I’d been typing it all morning!
So I was in mid-mentioning it. Too slow.
getting Brodeur to move sideways then picking the 5-hole like that was a thing of brilliance
Yes, yes it was.
by general borschevsky on Oct 30, 2008 12:28 PM EDT up reply actions
Kaberle
opened up the legs, and slid her home.
THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID.
Fuck I love Kaberle.
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
I thought
Brodeur opened his legs for Kabby? you know he is alot more bendy now that he lost 5lbs, he losnt 5lbs, did you know he lost 5lbs and thats why he can move and bend like that, he lost 5lbs!!
sorry, I got stuck in Pierre McGuire mode for a second.
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions
WHAT A MONSTER!
less 5 pounds…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:48 AM EDT up reply actions
5 pounds
to an anorexic/bulimic, 5 pounds is a lot
To Brodeur, that’s only one less pie a week
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing
Nah
he just stopped getting it a la mode
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 11:51 AM EDT up reply actions
this is borderline
NFSW
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
you're assuming
IT doesn’t read my interwebs
They probably do
"God's in His heaven. All's right with the world." - Robert Browning (1812-1889)
they probably get a good laugh out of us
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:01 PM EDT up reply actions
what is
Not For Safe Work…?
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions
Jiri Tlusty!
also your face
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 12:02 PM EDT up reply actions
you face fails
at life…and so’s your face! in your face, face!
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 12:05 PM EDT up reply actions
mad skillz
i gots dem…
Anybody throws me against the boards I'm gonna piss all over myself.
by blurr1974 on Oct 30, 2008 1:17 PM EDT up reply actions
HAHAHA
Crazy dog! That’s awesome.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
My dog used to chase the sprinkler stream around the yard, it was many afternoons of entertainment for my drunk ass on the deck
Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 30, 2008 6:58 PM EDT up reply actions
Leafs win, Arsenal mess up.
Man that last five minutes was shockingly bad.
Good to see a load of Liverpooh fans in the club cheering on Tottscum as well.
Lets see how you boys get on against them on Saturday.
Nobody wins anything in October…….
As for the Leafs……wow. The team spirit is looking really good and we’re eighth. Hopefully we’ll sneak eighth at the end of the season too.
No one wins in October
But you can lose the league against the Lilywhites at home!
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
I think that we could be in serious trouble, defensively, if we don’t get rid of Godawfulgallas.
I’m not sure we’ll lose the league because of this, but a combination of things, of which my still hungovertwodayslatergodi’mgettingold brain can’t be bothered to go into.
On a different note, did you see that the best player of all time has become the new Argentinian coach?
Yeah
The second best player of all time is coaching a tonne of offensive talent. It will either be a spectacular success (another World Cup?) or spectacular failure (a team of coke heads?). Either way, it’ll be riveting.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
No :(
But MYFO does apparently.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Listen for the "giggity"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0anaCNDvGo
A Toronto sports blog, where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...
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