Pension Plan Puppets: An SB Nation Community

Navigation: Jump to content areas:



Around SBN: Phillies Coast Past Brewers, Face L.A. In NLCS Bar-right-arrows



FTB - Move Along...Nothing To Read Here

I fielded a phone call from Moose on Sunday night where over the course of 2 minutes his mood went from "in shock" to "off his ass elated" at the news that his favorite team, the Oilers, just traded Jared Stoll and Matt Greene to the Kings for Lubo Visnovski. The Oilers have been after Visnovski for a long time now and the trade...I'm sorry, this just in...everyone in North America reporting...yes, that Mats Sundin still has not decided if, and/or who he'll play for in the upcoming season. That story, once again...Mats Sundin, totally, completely, undecided.

Who's everyone? Well, this site, your site, TSN, Sportsnet, the entire Sun Media, The Wall Street Journal, Christian Science Monitor, People Espanol. Two Jehovah's Witnesses came to my door yesterday and kindly left me with a copy of "The Watchtower" magazine. On the cover, right below where it said, "Why You Need To Prepare For Armageddon NOW!" it said, "Sundin: Where's The Big Swede Gonna Go?"

All of those everyone's seem to have a completely speculative answer (The Watchtower's: AK Bars), and the thing we need to remember is that almost all of them are complete bullshit. I'm not saying he won't end up in Montreal or with the Rangers, or for that matter AK Bars, what I mean is when you read the head guy on that site say that his source heard from "Mats' friends" that he's going to Montreal, that's just bullshit. Watch, I'll prove it. Here's one just as valid: My sources tell me that Mats' brother Tommy likes ice cream with his pie. But my other source tells me that Tommy likes his pie with a slice of cheese! Hey, hey, these are just rumors, people. I'm just telling you what I hear. Look, it's boring, but Sundin is waiting. And waiting. Remember? It was the name of his last album:

Hescoreheshootmatsroses_medium

Great, great, writer Howard Berger bravely waded in to the murky waters himself by informing everyone that his belief was that Mats would sign with Montreal. This was a jesture of solidarity between Berger and the Montreal Limousine and Taxi Drivers Association. Imagine the articles Berger will have after a couple of smoked meats on his way to the Bell Center this year?

Berger: "Just say anything about the Leafs and I'll print it, just like last time".

Limo Driver: "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?"

Berger: "Pure gold, Jean-Guy!"

After a flurry of activity last week surrounding (former) Leaf players, things have gone quiet...perhaps a little too quiet... The (cup) Boards are spare this morning. Let's see what we got:

  • General B. only encourages Jared of London's obsession with puns with the titular post "Eye of the Tucker". Thankfully he has some great final, final, parting words for out beloved D.T., including an awesome dream of Darc winning the Cup with Les Penguines. 
  • The kindly Navin shows his sensitive side and pays heed to the old adage that if you love something, set it free. Naturally he's talking about Mats and how no matter where Mats goes, Nav will always support and root for him. He also mentions being "tickled" and "Gay Day". So, you know, there's that.
  • Moose continues to see what I go through every single day keeping He Score, He Shoot! up and running. It's basically like "Mr. Mom" over there. Right now, he's at home trying to figure out the washing machine while I'm away on business getting hit on by Martin Mull. Just after he made the grilled cheese sandwich with the iron, he wrote his post about how much he needs and misses me, about Mats (big surprise), the new Tampa Bay Cosa Nostra ownership, and, now that he's been traded to L.A., how much Jared Stoll is  going to get. And he doesn't mean money.

  • To The Comments!

0 recs | Comment 13 comments

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

Display:

the end?

I love the Watchtower People. Good conversationalists, really easy-going. A lot of them seem to be huge fans of Wendel.
Thanks for the link. I’ve had to look up “titular” and “alliteration” in the dictionary. Next up, Hyperbole!
Also, I regret to inform: Gary Roberts has reportedly agreed to sign a one year contract that could pay between $1.5 and $2 million.

by general borschevsky on Jun 30, 2008 8:46 AM EDT   0 recs

Solid post Greener. I need to think up something clever for the July 1st Free Agent Spectacular and Mats Sundin Goodbye Banquet.

Darcy Tucker Fan Club*
* Blog contains less than 2% Darcy Tucker by weight.

by Chemmy on Jun 30, 2008 9:15 AM EDT   0 recs

not so fast

mats may yet return

www.sportsandthecity.com

Where we unequivocally and unapologetically support the home team...

by eyebleaf on Jun 30, 2008 10:59 AM EDT to parent up   0 recs

Puns

They aren’t an obsession, they are a way of life.

Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option

by JaredFromLondon on Jun 30, 2008 9:37 AM EDT   0 recs

that didn't take long

Hyperbole (pronounced /haɪˈpɝːbəli/ hye-PER-buh-lee; =exaggeration and is a figure of speech in which statements are exaggerated. It may be used to evoke strong feelings or to create a strong impression, and is not meant to be taken literally.

by general borschevsky on Jun 30, 2008 9:57 AM EDT to parent up   0 recs

Hyperbole

I take everything seriously

Because Taking The Leafs Seriously Is Not An Option

by JaredFromLondon on Jun 30, 2008 10:48 AM EDT to parent up   0 recs

I didn’t want to make a post for this, but my men’s league team won the league championship last night. That’s not terribly exciting, it’s how we did it.

The championship is a best of three series. In game one we took the lead for the first time with two minutes left in the third before scoring an empty netter to win 5-3. In game two we were losing 2-0 with 48 seconds left before my line scored three goals in 34 seconds (I got three first assists) to win the game without going to overtime.

That was probably the most fun I’ve ever had playing hockey.

Darcy Tucker Fan Club*
* Blog contains less than 2% Darcy Tucker by weight.

by Chemmy on Jun 30, 2008 11:13 AM EDT   0 recs

Congrats Chemm! Great job. And Nav is right people. Mats may still sign with The Leafs.

He Score, He Shoot! Soon to Be Announced As the New Leafs GM

by Greener on Jun 30, 2008 12:46 PM EDT to parent up   0 recs

Even a dull news day..

Is more entertaining than watching the Euro cup. Seriously people, when an entire 90 minute game can easily be compressed down to less than 2 minutes of highlights (including slo-mo replays!) something is wrong with the sport.

But then, it’s not like I had anything better to do on Sunday.. No new post on here saw to that! sob

Also, what’s with Tampa these days? Are they gearing up for cup run already? They remind me of the spasm of trades/pickups that Phoenix had last year, only to result in them doing absolutely f-all. Granted, Phoenix didn’t have anyone like Vinny signed to a gigantic 7 year contract..

by LeafFanInVan on Jun 30, 2008 1:00 PM EDT   0 recs

Yeah nothing was going on and I think quality is more important than quantity, sorry.

(I was really fucking hung over, ok?)

Darcy Tucker Fan Club*
* Blog contains less than 2% Darcy Tucker by weight.

by Chemmy on Jun 30, 2008 1:16 PM EDT to parent up   0 recs

I kid, I kid..And a hangover is an utterly valid excuse!

by LeafFanInVan on Jun 30, 2008 1:39 PM EDT to parent up   0 recs

Great photo again...

but that weird look Mats is giving me is crepping me out. it’s like he’s surreptitiously undressing me with his eyes…

by loser domi on Jun 30, 2008 5:51 PM EDT   0 recs

Thanks D.
And we all know Mats has had his eye on you for a while now. Literally, his eye. That right one.

He Score, He Shoot! Soon to Be Announced As the New Leafs GM

by Greener on Jun 30, 2008 6:08 PM EDT to parent up   0 recs

Comments For This Post Are Closed


User Tools

Welcome to the SB Nation blog for the Toronto Maple Leafs.

FanPosts

Community blog posts and discussion.

Recommended FanPosts

Hitchhiker_42_small
1967 - or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Drought
Habsgirl2_crop_small
Just Kill Me I'm Writing on a Leafs Blog: Grab this!

Recent FanPosts

Hitchhiker_42_small
Leaf of the Day - Oct 3, 2008 - Anders Hedberg
Floridaleafok_small
Bring "Lak" back?
Hitchhiker_42_small
Leaf of the Day - Oct 2, 2008 - Paul Fenton
Floridaleafok_small
I need to be fed
Hitchhiker_42_small
Leaf of the Day - Oct. 1, 2008 - Bill Root
Dscn1755_small
revolu-schenn meetup.
Hitchhiker_42_small
Leaf of the Day - Sept 30, 2008 - Howie Meeker
Hitchhiker_42_small
Leaf of the Day - Sept 29, 2008 - Bill Thoms

Post_icon New FanPost All FanPosts Carrot-mini


Site Meter