Maple Leafs: Turn Head, Cough
As a doctor, I have devoted my life to ending the pain and suffering of those wretched souls who wander the world without hope, without direction. Choosing this path in life has brought me many riches; for example, it's how I met Chemmy. But now I want to put my powers to even greater use: I am going to help the Toronto Maple Leafs.
"But how?", none of you must be asking. How is Greener going to do it? Well, if I told you everything, I'd have to charge every one of you my full fee of $****.95 an hour, so I won't, but I will let you in on a little thing I use in my practice. It's a little wonder drug called POSITIVE THINK-ING! And just how am I going to do this for the Leafs? Well, I'm going to the Leafs/Ducks game today in Anaheim, and I will be personally instructing the boys on how to change the course of their season. I'll be going into the dressing room before game time. A cool guy I met online told me he'd bring me in. He said to come around to the back of the Honda Center around 6:30 where him and his friends will meet me. He said bring money, so that'll be cool. I love making new contacts!
So, a quick visual lesson in Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life™, by Dr. Greener, PhD, PsyD, SeXY.
So, in no particular order, come... enter my healing place.
I mean, right?!? Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you are already correct! You Leafs CAN win, because you WANT to win. Y...Y...You do want to win, right? Guys? *hilarious crickets sound*

God, it's funny cause it's true. The Leafs have lost everything, if "everything" means every hockey game in the 09/10 season. So that means, FREE PASS! You Leafs, to a man, are free to do absolutely anything. If by "anything" I mean beat the goddamn Ducks and let we, the lovers who love you, regain the ability to achieve an erection smile again.

What I'm saying here is that allowing yourselves to live in fear is WORSE than going out and facing up to the thing that you dread the most. In other words, going out there tonight and playing as hard as you can, throwing shot after shot at Ducks (hopefully) call-up goalie Justin Pogge is a lot better than waiting around for Brian Burke to call a meeting with you, Jason Blake, and telling you he's buying you a ticket to the Marlies. Did I say Jason Blake? That was a slip-up. I could have been talking about anyone.
So there you are, a quick lesson into how to make your life a success. I'm obviously living proof that it works. When you watch the game tonight, and Toronto is up by... uh... well let's just say when they're up, just look for the Leafs fan in the stands getting accolades from all his new chums. And when you spot me, just know that I'm thinking of all of you.
7 recs |
179 comments
|
Comments
Rec’n this for the Fight Club reference
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 11:15 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Clearly, Dr. Greener is doing the Lord’s work.
leaf fan stuck in ottawa, still. Now truculently rebranded!
by stucky on Oct 26, 2009 11:24 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
From the book of Genesis...
Because tonight, tonight, tonight, whoah,
We’re gonna make it right
Tonight, tonight, tonight, whoah
Can it before I drive this truculence through your faceulence and put you in an ambulance.
by Brunswick Bruiser on Oct 26, 2009 12:07 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Does no one comment on Greener articles or what? What are you jerks off doing instead, reading Howard Berger?
I won’t stand for this. I’m going to get this to 100 comments if I need to sing 100 bottles of beer on the wall myself.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:16 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Choosing this path in life has brought me many riches; for example, it’s how I met Chemmy.
That is, far and away, the saddest thing I’ve heard in my life.
"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09
by kidkawartha on Oct 26, 2009 1:50 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Didn’t you do this once before?
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 1:54 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Someone’s got sand in their trousers about the fantasy shellacking they took last week.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
No
It was a serious question
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
<3
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:03 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Awww Chemmy.
You can be my little spoon anytime
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
BCWW
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 2:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Some of us work during the day and have good sites like this blocked
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Albert Einstein
by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Oct 26, 2009 4:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Comment #5
I appreciate Greener’s use of colo(u)rful pictures to illustrate his posts.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:18 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Comment #6
Greener is a nice guy and I would drink beers with him if he lived on the right coast.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:18 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
wait
Greener lives on my coast? He rules!
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:20 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
despite the west coast thing, yes
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:21 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I would love to have a beer with Mr. Spielberg.
by general borschevsky on Oct 26, 2009 1:41 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Guys, shhhhhhh!
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I would love to look for you in the stands tonight, Greener, but the game is on Leafs TV and my husband won’t let me get Center Ice.
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:21 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
You really need to exercise your womanly voodoo here.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
yeah, god didnt give you assets for nothing
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:27 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I got $10 that she breaks him in under a week.
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
having seen pictures, i give him a concentrated night of effort on her part
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Withhold sex. Someone from PPP on the West Coast will have sex with you if you don’t want to deprive yourself.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
this is definitely the way to a happy marriage.
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
CENTER ICE.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
the real secret of a happy marriage
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:38 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Wait, what if you insisted on watching those “who wants to be a model” or “celebrity dancing” shows whenever the Canucks were on until he relented?
What if you dragged him shopping at 6:30PST on a Saturday and tried on shoes for three hours until he gave in?
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:38 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Holy hell!
Just thinking about those possibilities makes me want to go out and buy Centre Ice for any woman I meet from now on, in case I marry her. They get better treatment at Gitmo!
Leafs Rumination: hockey and sesquipedalianism.
by puckurgently on Oct 26, 2009 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Keep your woman happy. I bought mine a Tivo HD so she could watch her dancing shows on the HDTV in the bedroom whenever she’d like.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
would crush the soul of any man yearning for hockey. of course, he’s a Canuck fan so we aren’t really talking hockey, more aptly described as ice capades in front of a greasy octopus playing goal.
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
If he tries to follow the score on his phone while shoe shopping Karina is obligated to ask if he doesn’t like spending time with her.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:44 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I just need to make sure the games aren’t blacked out here anyways. Anyone have any idea where I could find this?
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
What do you mean by blacked out?
You absolutely 100% will not get any regional broadcasts (i.e., Leafs tv, Snet-O) iwthout Centre Ice. You will get only the CBC and TSN-National broadcasts. The Leafs website should indicate who the broadcaster is for each game and whether the game is nationally televised.
Just ordered C-I today, son!
Identical to Sergei Berezin in every way, only 1/10 his size.
From Russia with GLOVE SIDE!
by Sergei Puckizin on Oct 26, 2009 6:12 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I would have joined Greener in Anaheim, and purchased him a tall cold frosty beverage of his choosing, had I hung on to my tickets.
also, re: “fear makes the wolf look bigger”
TWSS.
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 1:25 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
There are tickets for SIX DOLLARS on Stubhub now.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I know!!!
I’m going … what side should I get?
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 1:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Shit for that price get both.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:27 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
hell, get 4, one behind each net and one at each side of the ice
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:27 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Tonight will be all Leafs fans. The GO LEAFS GO is going tol be ridiculous.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
but
what side? the side the ducks shot twice or the leafs?
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 1:30 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I vote for the side the ducks shoot twice so you can watch the monster
by Hungry Leafs Fan on Oct 26, 2009 1:36 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
That was my thinking..
But Greener what side are you sitting on? You watching the Monster for two or watching the Leafs score?
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 1:50 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I’m watching the Leafs shoot twice.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:54 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
…and by shoot twice, I mean, score once.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:54 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
50%! Cup half full!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:55 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
…and by shoot twice, I mean, score -once- FIRST!!!!!1.
Fixed!
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 1:58 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The Leafs win tonight. For sure.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
WIN LEAFS WIN
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Probably. The game’s on at 10 for me and I have a men’s league game at 10:30.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
if the Leafs win tonight
do we get to riot?
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:00 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
NO
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Pfffft. No fun.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Read Berger’s article to see why I say no
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
if Berger says no
then the answer is yes.
if Berger says yes, the answer is still yes
FREE BIG SCREEN TVS FOR ALL!!!!1
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
YAY!
I’ve been wanting a new big screen TV for so long!
leaf fan stuck in ottawa, still. Now truculently rebranded!
by stucky on Oct 26, 2009 2:03 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
me too!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Forget the TV’s, I’m going straight for the scratch and win lottery tickets!!
The Skinny Fishbowl - Random Musings of a Hockey Fan
by SkinnyFish on Oct 26, 2009 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
SHHHHHH
we’ll distract them with the TVs…
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
shiny objects!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
He says that once the Leafs win, we will fills the streets.
FUCK HIM
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:05 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
and when I say win, I mean 1 game
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
2 in a row and he’ll shit his pants
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
So the plan to go kick his ass is off? Sigh.
Resident Capologist
by clrkaitken on Oct 26, 2009 2:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I don’t read berger
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I read the title. That was enough for me.
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
YOu can imagine the rest
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:10 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I don’t see why not.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
burn the town to ground!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:02 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
in socal
It would be only right to RIOT!!!
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Where are you at?
i’m stuck in the bellybutton of California unfortunately….Visalia.
my wife is SLOWLY coming round to the idea of moving.
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Pfffft it’s only 217 miles to the game.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:11 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
yup
except for a stretch of the 5 called the grapevine that can get squirrly in the wrong weather, and that whole LA traffic thing…
it’s a quick trip!
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:13 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Me?
I live in LA – Miracle Mile
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 2:12 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
/sigh
jealous
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:13 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Visalia? Jesus christ man, get the HELL outta there.
by Connie Kim on Oct 26, 2009 2:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
trying
came close a few years back, then the housing bubble burst.
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:22 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dude...
Still.
First chance you get, get out, okay?
Promise?
by Connie Kim on Oct 26, 2009 2:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
pinky swear
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I don’t even know where that is!
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 2:22 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
off the 99
between Fresno and Bakersfield
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
whoa
That’s out there… Must be nice tho?
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 2:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
no
not at all.
the only reason i’m still living here is because of my wife. she’s worth it though…
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
113 comments. We’re done here.
Pension Plan Puppets*
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by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
you're welcome
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
too late!
CANT STOP
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
WONT STOP
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
This is now an unstoppable commenting force.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
can we get to 200?
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lets be bold! 300!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 3:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Guys, didn’t you read the post? YOU REALLY CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT!!
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 3:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
A Quiet Riot.
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
it's a 3 hour drive...
not happening given my current state of work.
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 1:30 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
:(
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
or possible baconitis!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jesus
I could fly there and go to the game for less than I’d spend to go to a game at the ACC ten feet away from my apartment.
Leafs Rumination: hockey and sesquipedalianism.
by puckurgently on Oct 26, 2009 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
i love toronto too
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 3:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
TRUCULENCE
is a warm gun… in your mouth.
"There's been four different Cup winners the last four years, and I got one of them (Anaheim) and it was a fighting team. We're playing it that way regardless." - B. Burke, Toronto Maple Leafs GM
by BlueBuds on Oct 26, 2009 2:35 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Seriously!
I checked stubhub for Leafs/Oilers in December. Standing rooms for $150 each. It would actually be cheaper to fly to Anaheim for the damn game!
Identical to Sergei Berezin in every way, only 1/10 his size.
From Russia with GLOVE SIDE!
by Sergei Puckizin on Oct 26, 2009 6:12 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
We really need more positive thinking…who’s the wolf, fraser? bettman? SNES fans? Canuckleheads? Toths?
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:28 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
kyle wellwood
fear is a metaphor for deep fried gravy
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Wellwood ate the wolf, little red hiding hood, the three little pigs and about 40 other fable characters!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
thats what happens when you spill mustard on a fairy tale book
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 1:36 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Fiction is delicious
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
We’re the wolf. In time teams will see through our sheep’s clothing and recognize what we truly are.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:32 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Or it could be you’re the righteous man and I’m the shepherd and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. I’d like that. But that shit ain’t the truth. The truth is you’re the weak. And I’m the tyranny of evil men. But I’m tryin’, Ringo. I’m tryin’ real hard to be a shepherd.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 1:36 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jules, if you give him $1500 I’m going to shoot him on general principle.
Identical to Sergei Berezin in every way, only 1/10 his size.
From Russia with GLOVE SIDE!
by Sergei Puckizin on Oct 26, 2009 6:16 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Greener
you’re good people. I hope the Leafs read this
THIS IS A JOKE
by loser domi on Oct 26, 2009 1:37 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
i ♥ your new sig LD...
it’s like the rallying cry for the season…
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 1:41 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
thanks
originally a dig at a certain Nucks fan, but your angle makes it make more sense
THIS IS A JOKE
by loser domi on Oct 26, 2009 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
VanCityDan?
that guy was HYSTERICAL
/sarcasm
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 1:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
When he dies, the Canucks are going to raise their first banner in years.
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:49 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
years?
they raised one last year…
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 1:49 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
that was the point…I wasn’t predicting an early or quick or painfree death for him
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:51 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
LD, you know, I’ve always favored you.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:44 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
AWWW thanks, Greener
THIS IS A JOKE
by loser domi on Oct 26, 2009 1:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The Leafs should take all their motivational advice from Tyler Durden.
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 1:49 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09
by kidkawartha on Oct 26, 2009 1:55 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Link doesn’t work for me
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 1:57 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oops. Everything’s going to be fine.
"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09
by kidkawartha on Oct 26, 2009 2:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The ending of the book is better.
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 2:39 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
BY FAR!
Have you read any of his other books?
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:40 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Most of them.
I like Survivor and Invisible Monsters. I’m a bit meh on the others.
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 2:43 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Those 2 were good, as was Choke. Lullaby, Diary, Rant were meh. Haunted was good as well. His latest book Pygmy was a very good read. Fight Club is still his best tho
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I liked Survivor a lot. Didn’t we just talk about this last week?
Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)
by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Oct 26, 2009 2:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I probably wasn’t here for it
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I liked “Haunted”, it’s a collection of short stories. I’ve said it here before but Palahniuk tries to be shocking to a fault, like how most movies with plot twists are boring because every movie has to have a big twist nowadays, but the short format allows him to get to his shocking point and move on without dragging it out.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
That’s actually a very astute point
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:48 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I am getting a lot of comments as to why there is an image of a penis around the 0:52 mark. So to make it clear for everyone, the penis is a reference to earlier in the film when the “narrator” states that Tyler has a job at the movie theater and adds in splices or pornography when the film needs to be changed.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 2:43 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Ya, that made me laugh.
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
YouTube comments are monumentally stupid.
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 2:57 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
HIS NAME WAS GARY ROBERTS. HIS NAME WAS GARY ROBERTS…
-repeat endlessly
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 1:56 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I felt like putting a bullet between the eyes of every Player that wouldn’t scre to save its team. I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers and smother all the French beaches I’d never see. I wanted to breathe smoke.
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 2:00 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
The LeafsEveryone should take all their motivational advice from Tyler Durden
Resident Cook and IT Superman
Truculence FTW
by leafer1984 on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I love lamp.
That is all.
jrwendelman
The Artist Formerly Known as "Junior", who blogs at heroesinrehab.ca/blog
"But if someone so eager to engage into fist talk, we can always meet after season end in Minsk." (Mikhail Grabovski and a well-meaning but not particularly skillful translator)
by jrwendelman on Oct 26, 2009 1:57 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
lamp, is there anything lamp can’t do!
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Lamp couldn’t follow up an 11-0 season with anything of value, but then again, neither could Tom Filer.
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:07 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
he was a one hit wonder for the Jays. Bullpen superstars come and go.
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
But we love them anyway.
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:29 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
and give them the occasional pity vote on the all star game ballots
Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!
by blindfolded tank driver on Oct 26, 2009 2:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
When two members of your staff are a combined 18-0, that rather helps one win a pennant.
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 2:36 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dennis!
Leaf, the universe and everything.
by 1967ers on Oct 26, 2009 1:59 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey, should we vote Komisarek to the all star game anyways?
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 3:26 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
if we’re gonna do that, we should vote in exelby
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 3:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Sold.
Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.
by Chemmy on Oct 26, 2009 3:26 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
or blake, just for fun
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
actually, fuck it. just send sundin anyways
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 3:28 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
he’ll turn it down to rest, as always
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 3:30 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
In a sideways related way, can you imagine how USA Hockey must be shitting themselves as they have the dynamic duo of Wilson/Burke heading up their Olympic hockey hopes?
They better still believe in miracles.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 3:31 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
well, the lineup team USA will have will be wayyyyyyy better than the one the leafs have
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 3:34 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I think you’re missing my point.
He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career
by Greener on Oct 26, 2009 3:35 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
I know I am.
"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky
by Karina on Oct 26, 2009 3:36 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
well…. enlighten me then. Wilson and Burke are solid hockey people, why would USA be worried cause the leafs suck? To them thats probably a normal thing
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 4:42 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
A pilot and his co-piot crash a plane into the runway tower. They then crawl out of the burning wreckage and climb into the cockpit of another, albiet bigger, better, more expensive, airplane. Yes the pilots are regarded as solid “avaiation” people, but that doesn’t stop the passengers on that 2nd flight from being rightfully concerned and nervous.
by general borschevsky on Oct 26, 2009 6:38 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
awesome. I understand everything now.
What if one of the pilots has piloted a stanley cup champion before…? and the other, made it to the finals but got out piloted by his rival pilot…. would that settle down the passengers a bit?
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 7:46 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
i think the passengers would be more concerned with where the pilots heads were currently at after such a fiery plane crash
All In Balls Out, Since 1983
by JaredFromLondon on Oct 26, 2009 7:48 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
what if thats not the real story at all, what if….
the pilots were moments away from a deadly crash landing when suddenly the landing gear finally becomes unjammed! the landing gear drops just as the plane hits the runway, the co pilot then pulls off one of the most death defying maneuvers in aviation history and not only avoids the runway tower but somehow wins a backhander top cheese.
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 7:51 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
lol
i meant to say …“but somehow wins the stanley cup with a backhander top cheese!”
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 7:52 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Is this actually likely to happen or is it strictly hypothetical?
by general borschevsky on Oct 26, 2009 8:06 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
all Star game?
do they do those in Olympic years? For some reason I thought they didn’t for the Torino games
THIS IS A JOKE
by loser domi on Oct 26, 2009 5:22 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
No all star game this year, as far as I am aware
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Albert Einstein
by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Oct 26, 2009 5:32 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
correct
no all star game
"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...
by blurr1974 on Oct 26, 2009 5:40 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
olympic hockey > taking a dump > nhl all-star game
by birky on Oct 26, 2009 5:49 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
the skills stuff can be kinda neat at times.
THIS IS A JOKE
by loser domi on Oct 26, 2009 6:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
skills comp
is the only part worth watching.
Identical to Sergei Berezin in every way, only 1/10 his size.
From Russia with GLOVE SIDE!
by Sergei Puckizin on Oct 26, 2009 6:19 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
they don’t even score it anymore
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Albert Einstein
by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Oct 26, 2009 6:53 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
dammit, now we cant vote XLB into a starting spot
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 7:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Perhaps they should hire Brett Hull as their GM?
"I wouldn't know him, if I ran him over in my car." - Pat Burns
by BillBergBumperCars on Oct 26, 2009 3:58 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Rec’d because it’s a Greener post.
Pumps out more male with one thrust of the pelvis than the United States postal service over the last 146 years.
by Blinky on Oct 26, 2009 5:41 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Tomorrow's headline:
Leafs Snap Losing Streak!
Identical to Sergei Berezin in every way, only 1/10 his size.
From Russia with GLOVE SIDE!
by Sergei Puckizin on Oct 26, 2009 6:19 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Byline
Monster shines as Leafs finally score first win, Pogge Sobs on Anaheim Bench
Resident Capologist
by clrkaitken on Oct 26, 2009 6:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Has Pogge even been to Anaheim yet?
"We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into Iraq"
- Major Mike Shearer
by article1 on Oct 26, 2009 6:33 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
who?
There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"
by Matt_Roberts on Oct 26, 2009 7:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
From a Canuck fan.
I really like Toronto’s chance here. I think being a former Burke / Nonis run team, you guys were prepared perfectly for last game. Hemmed us in almost the entire third period by barricading the sideboards Knowing we’d never attempt going up the middle. Incredible effort for a full 60 minutes. Byfar the best Leaf game I’ve seen them play this year.
I expect to see this again in Anaheim having inside knowledge of how to exploit a former team. Just hope Gus holds up.
by kesrows on Oct 26, 2009 8:04 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

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