Andrew "The Razor" Raycroft Update

Hello Leafs Fans,

I hope you enjoyed watching the game tonight (Leafs@Sabres, 30/10/09) - I hear we outplayed the Electric Swordslugs pretty handily, but once again emerged with ONE POINT. That's right, in tonight's game the Maple Leafs earned the same amount of points that we accumulated in the first 8 games! That also gives us four points in three games! Break out the Champagne!

Anyway...I say that I "hear" we outplayed the Sabres because I didn't get to watch the game myself. So that pretty much rules out any post-game analysis from this guy. Unfortunately, unlike a lot of you people, Leafs games aren't always on in my region. I know, I know - it's a travesty! I live in Vancouver, home of the 2010 Winter Olympics, the world's finest marijuana, and lots and lots of hot asian girls who will never ever look you in the eyes.

Also, we have the Vancouver Canucks - and they played tonight!  So instead of watching my heroes play a tight game against a division rival I was forced to watch the schmucks vs. the ducks on Sportsnet. And you'll never guess who was between the pipes...

Andrew Raycroft was born May 4th 1980 to Joe and Hank Raycroft at Canada Hospital, Canada. No one knows which one of his two dads grunted him into existence - but we do know that the colour brown would continue to be an important colour to young Andy, as he was drafted by the Boston Browns in 1998. Shortly after the Browns changed their name to the Bruins, because I dunno, Cam Neely said so. Then Raycroft won the Calder Trophy in 2004, beating out Michael Ryder and Trent Hunter, who have since left the league to become crab fishermen on "Deadliest Catch." In 2005, no one won the Calder, possibly because Andrew Raycroft set the bar way too high.

Then, in a shocking move, Andrew Raycroft was traded to the Maple Leafs in 2006 for Tuuka Rask, who would never be heard from again. Raycroft played well for the Maple Leafs - so well in fact, that he caused Head Coach Paul Maurice to repeatedly weep tears of what we can only assume were pure joy.

Suddenly, the evil hockey media decided that Raycroft sucked. The Leafs buckled under the pressure of the mean newspaper men and bought out his contract. Then the Vancouver Canucks signed him. Shortly after, the evil hockey media decided that Raycroft was actually good, using headlines like this in their pre-game articles. Leafs fans were all like "WTF that guy is a steaming pile!" but Canucks fans were all like "nah bro its all good - Raycroft is solid - goalie controversy brewing - Trevor Linden for HHOF is a lock."

October 30th, 2009 - Vancouver vs. Anaheim, Andrew Raycroft gets the start, and shortly after puck drop, a two goal lead. He can just coast to an easy victory, right?

35 minutes later...L, 6.03 GAA, .818 SV%

How's the Raycroft wave looking now, CBC/Canucks?

Yep, you got it. The team that the Leafs beat 6-3 less than a week ago, just beat Andrew Raycroft senseless.

This concludes your first and final Andrew Raycroft update.