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God's Team went 1-1-3 on a five game road trip and they would have done better if someone whose nickname rhymes with "Dog ship" didn't torpedo a strong effort on Saturday. Have the Leafs turned the corner, who knows? But tomorrow night the latest in a string of Leafs saviours, Phil Kessel, makes his debut at the ACC in front of the faithful, the suits, and in front of our unquestioned starting goaltender: the Monster.

The weird thing about all of this is Damien Cox:

But you'd have to agree seven points is hardly an Everest-like mountain to climb. If the Leafs did catch the pack, it wouldn't go down as one of the greatest hockey comebacks since the Miracle on Manchester.

I just read a Damien Cox post and feel BETTER about the Leafs. What the hell is going on? Someone hold me. I made the mistake of believing in Toskala on Saturday, check this out:

8:15 Chemmy: Oh my god please let Toskala be ready to be a sick backup/platoon goalie.

Followed immediately by:

8:16 PPP:  O HAI TOSKALOL

So, Damien, this isn't personal unlike most of my puerile grudges. You seem to be writing great articles but if I stop hating you that all might go away. So, here it is:

 

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Comments

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I'm convinced that Cox's clone is writing these positive articles...

The real one got stuffed in The Star’s broom closet.

Junior Director of Anti-Bandwagoning, PPP Amalgamated Heavy Industries
Truculence is Everything: We Rant, We Caption, We Care.

by Kavel Pubina on Nov 2, 2009 10:32 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

Missed Blog

Hey guys.

I wrote a blog last week entailing 30 realistic goals for the Leafs after they got their first win. It never got posted and obviously never got read a whole lot so if I could still get that up it’d be awesome.

http://leafandlion.blogspot.com/2009/10/30-realistic-goals-for-remainder-of.html

by leafandlion on Nov 2, 2009 10:40 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

FTB

Links go in the links post.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Nov 2, 2009 10:42 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

FTB’s one stop down.

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Nov 2, 2009 10:42 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

This article also made me feel strange. It could have been ripped from the Barilkosphere headlines.

Acknowledgement that Leafs are doing poorly? Check.
Relevant stats that show good areas? Check.
Look around the league to see other teams in trouble? Check.
Cautious, cautious optimism? Check.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Nov 2, 2009 10:59 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

They showed great guts in fighting back to almost steal wins against the Sabres and Habs. Tomas Kaberle has been superb for the past four games, as good as he’s been since he was clocked by New Jersey goon Cam Janssen several years ago. Right now, Kaberle leads all NHL defencemen in points.

When I read that, I thought “He’s been reading the Barilkosphere again.” He didn’t credit Chemmy or me at all. Typical.

by general borschevsky on Nov 2, 2009 11:06 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

The sentence contained the word “Kaberle” and didn’t contain the phrase “lazy defensive end play, soft in his own zone, makes stupid cutesy turnovers”, it wasn’t cribbed from me.

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Nov 2, 2009 11:09 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

since he was clocked by New Jersey goon Cam Janssen

Just that.

by general borschevsky on Nov 2, 2009 11:11 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Oh yeah I feel like a broken record about that.

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Nov 2, 2009 11:11 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Normally I expect Cox to kick the Leafs while they are down, so his sudden optimism (cautious but there) is sort of awkward feeling.

Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!

by blindfolded tank driver on Nov 2, 2009 11:01 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

DON’T GIVE INTO HIS TRICK

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Nov 2, 2009 11:03 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

He’s going to pull the classic “heel” turn later on in the season. I can feel it.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Nov 2, 2009 11:04 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

first winning streak, or especially if the Leafs are basically out of contention and make a run in March or something

Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!

by blindfolded tank driver on Nov 2, 2009 11:09 AM EST up reply actions   0 recs

He's like the Armond White of Leafs media writers

When they’re playing poorly he defends them, when they’re playing well he bashes them.

Moustache Fever, not to be confused with swine flu.

by Shield on Nov 2, 2009 8:55 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

With his beady little eyes and flapping head so full of lies…. BLAME DAMIEN!

I can’t remember who posted that the first time, but now that is all I can hear in my head when I see his picture…

Life as a Toronto Sports Fan?... *sigh*... It is what it is...

by JohnnyG on Nov 2, 2009 11:25 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

you’re welcome

Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)

by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Nov 2, 2009 12:14 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Ah it was you.

Nice job on that one.

Life as a Toronto Sports Fan?... *sigh*... It is what it is...

by JohnnyG on Nov 2, 2009 12:21 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

I really have no idea how Cox has been good this year. And now I feel realllyyy dirty for saying that.

by Clawson on Nov 2, 2009 11:47 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

Seeing Cox re-dedicate himself this year and consistently pump out great work just makes Howard Berger’s continued schtick seem even more tired by comparison.

Down Goes Brown - Unapologetically nostalgic for the past. Brutally realistic about the present. Grudgingly optimistic about the future.

by Down Goes Brown on Nov 2, 2009 11:58 AM EST reply actions   0 recs

Figures that Berger didn’t get the memo from the cool kids that they were going to cover the team like professionals.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Nov 2, 2009 12:02 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

heh

my theory was more that Cox looked at the Leafs Abomination book, and then the Why The Leafs Suck book, read a bit of Berger, and realized how much everyone around him sucks, and that if he put minimal effort into his articles he could become by far the best journalist covering the Leafs, and has followed through.

"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky

by Karina on Nov 2, 2009 12:06 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

My theory is that his contract is up this year, and he spent the summer at the Jose Theodore School of Pretending To Give a Crap.

Resident Capologist

by clrkaitken on Nov 2, 2009 12:57 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Or he's just trying to differentiate himself

Being contrarian to the conventional wisdom is getting-attention-journalism 101. Normally the pundits drool over the leafs (by which I mean, leave them physically damp from the secretions of attenion-whore journalists), so maybe he feels the need to put them down to separate himself from the pack.

Now everyone’s beating on them so much that he can stand out by taking optimistic stands. If they win a bunch more, all of a sudden everyone will sing their praise,a nd he’ll go back to claiming they suck.

and the Mustache of Truculence (formerly Canada4Mizzou)

by Wan Ihite on Nov 2, 2009 5:38 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

This would have been a better place to put my Armond White analogy.

If anyone doesn’t know, he’s a movie critic who basically gives all bad movies good reviews and all good movies bad ones. He hated UP and loved Dance Flick.

Moustache Fever, not to be confused with swine flu.

by Shield on Nov 2, 2009 8:57 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

controversy sells

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Nov 2, 2009 9:03 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Cox mentioned on the radio a few weeks back that his daughter is a leafs fan. I think she is old enough now to read his columns so I think he has to make sure she doesn’t cry or he will lose major brownie points at home.

Hence – his sneering and contempt have been muted to a degree. Which is a good thing because out of the bunch (Berger Strachan etc. ) Cox is a decent writer – when he sticks to writing.

If God didn't want me to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?

by The Meatriarchy on Nov 2, 2009 1:52 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

maybe Berger was waiting until November when, of course, it matters. (and honestly, he couldn’t have read the memo)

Brain: The irony of it all, Pinky. Years of trying to take over the world, and all I had to do was say "truculence".
Follow me I'm Boring!

by blindfolded tank driver on Nov 2, 2009 12:07 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Cox has also been the guy that says the Leafs need to rebuild, and they are doing that..

but you also look at the fact that the Leafs have deserved better on that road trip – compared to the garbage since Game 2 – it deserves some praise.

by hallandnash on Nov 2, 2009 12:27 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

If you want we can change your username.

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Nov 2, 2009 12:32 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

I think he’s talking about scott hall and Kevin Nash…right?

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Nov 2, 2009 12:36 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Outsiders rule!

They call me Splodeybones.

by SkinnyFish on Nov 2, 2009 1:38 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

It’s a good thing for the Maple Leafs the NHL isn’t just about winning.

No, that ended some time ago. Now it’s about getting points, something a team can do by winning, yes, but by losing as well.

Technically he probably should have said it was always thus in the NHL, considering that the league counted ties in the standings from the beginning of its existence right up until The Great Shoot-out Experiment.

leaf fan stuck in ottawa, still. Now truculently rebranded!

by stucky on Nov 2, 2009 12:45 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

A tie awarded each team 50% of the available points, it didn’t create additional points out of thin air.

Resident Capologist

by clrkaitken on Nov 2, 2009 12:58 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

As much as I detest the charity point, it makes being a leaf fan better these days. It also makes it harder for the Leafs to catch up to teams in front of us in the standings.

by Its Cold In Here on Nov 2, 2009 1:13 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

Obviously it’s not about winning, its a goal scoring competition, and you can win without scoring the most goals. Go Flyers!

Moustache Fever, not to be confused with swine flu.

by Shield on Nov 2, 2009 8:59 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

I think its safe to say that the Hurricanes are now the worst team in the nhl

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Nov 2, 2009 1:14 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

Sometimes I think Cox just enjoys being a contrarian.

Leaf fans are hopeful? He’ll write as much disingenious stuff as possible to put the team down (two firsts for Luke Schenn, anybody?)

Leaf fans are allegedly in a panic? He suddenly writes sensible stuff that says the team just might be alright.

Bitter Leaf Fan: because sometimes there's no option but to be bitter...

by mf37 on Nov 2, 2009 2:35 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

Hey

GMTA

and the Mustache of Truculence (formerly Canada4Mizzou)

by Wan Ihite on Nov 2, 2009 5:39 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

He has suffered a severe head injury which caused him to lose his bias and granted him the ability to perceive situations objectively.

I hope he does not recover

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Nov 2, 2009 4:37 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

It may not even amount to being contrarian.

Cox probably perceives himself to be the moderator of all things maple leaf. He feels the need to tell those who run amok when the Leafs win a couple of games that things aren’t quite as good as they seem. He also apparently feels the need to tell people who are sick of the losing that things aren’t as bad as they appear right now either.

It’s also entirely possible that he has a better relationship with this Leafs management group than he did the past few crews. If he gets along with Burke and Wilson, he’s far more likely to out scoop those that don’t, and he’s also probably realized that panning the good ship MLSE is not a great career move if what happened to Al Strachan is any indication.

Write something that puts the club down in the press, and you could be out of a J O B? Something to ponder if you’re Cox.

"Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm."

- Sir Winston Churchill

I'm pretty sure he's talking about the Leafs.

by Steve@Leafs.HockeyAnalysis.com on Nov 2, 2009 5:58 PM EST reply actions   0 recs

heh

I’m curious as to why everyone thinks Strachan was fired because his booked panned the Leafs, as opposed to his unauthorized use of the HNIC logo on its cover?
I mean, I’d like to think that Burke had that kind of power, but even if he did, do you think he’d bother putting the effort in to get someone fired?

"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky

by Karina on Nov 2, 2009 6:21 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

i like to think he got fired because he was terrible at his job

but then that doesnt explain why the rest of them are there still

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Nov 2, 2009 6:23 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

he was terrible, but at least he kept it entertaining.
Maybe it was all the lies he told on air.

"The only way out is in a body bag. Go Leafs Go." - Blinky

by Karina on Nov 2, 2009 6:38 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

too bad we’ll never see milbury beat him with a shoe on live tv

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Nov 2, 2009 6:41 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

I like to think CBC was waiting for an excuse, and the logo gave it to them. Strachan was brutal in every way. I got no entertainment out of watching his and Milbury’s weekly “who’s a bigger idiot” contests at all.

Leafs Rumination: hockey and sesquipedalianism.

by puckurgently on Nov 2, 2009 9:46 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

I think

he’s scared that Ian White will kill him with his moustache if he says anything too negative about the Leafs.

Moustache Fever, not to be confused with swine flu.

by Shield on Nov 2, 2009 9:01 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

three ghosts of truculence past visited him on opening night, Wendels left, Wendels right and Wendels mustache

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Nov 2, 2009 9:04 PM EST up reply actions   0 recs

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