Ian White is Moustachulent, Blake Wheeler Should Be Suspended, and Hockey Night in Canada Hates Us

 
Glove tap to Belligerent Burkie for finding the incident in question

 
This has nothing to with this post other than I love posting Ian White kicking ass
The Man, The Myth, The Moustache

17. Bill McCreary apologized to Ian White for missing Blake Wheeler’s push from behind that sent White hard into boards. White said after the game, "I was lucky." Obviously, you’d love McCreary to see it and call it live, but good on him for manning up.

- Elliotte Friedman, 30 Thoughts

How long r we going to treat refs like they're above the law, above being questioned by the media? It's an outdated concept that needs 2 die

- Jason Whitlock, Twitter


Those two tweets, the latter re-tweeted by yours truly, were enough to sitr me from my blogging slumber. As usual, my muse Godd Till, was on gchat immediately to kick-start the creative process:

Till: AH YES, BECAUSE THE STANDARD OF OFFICIATING WOULD CERTAINLY BE IMPROVED BY SUSTAINED, INTELLIGENT CRITICISM BY THE HOWARD BERGERS OF THE WORLD

PPP: Not from the dumbasses of the world but the refs should have to answer for why they screwed up like with that White hit.

Till: UH HUH. 'REPLAYS SHOW THAT I WAS BLOCKED OUT ON THE PLAY' Remember that? Can't wait for more of that standard of ass-covering. This should be great.

 

Obviously, the fact that Bill McCreary missed the hit is mind-blowing. I won't beat around the bush, Ian White is bang on: he is very lucky. If he had been hit a half a stride or so sooner he could have woken up Sunday with a halo and paralysed from the waist or neck down. Blake Wheeler laid an absolutely filthy hit and the fact that he isn't suspended and that there was no call on the ice highlights the massive trouble the league faces in trying to cut dirty play out of the game.

The more upsetting part was that Blake Wheeler didn't stand up to Colton Orr when it came time to pay the piper. Normally, non-fighters obviously don't have to fight enforcers but 'The Code' is supposed to keep players from making those kinds of hits because they'll have to fight the Colton Orrs of the world. Instead, we saw Wheeler pull his best Claude Lemieux impression while the Bruins were rewarded with a powerplay. Of course, I don't want Orr to pull a Carcillo but is it to much to ask that Blake Wheeler man up? And if he won't, would it kill the league to dish out some punishment? I guess so.

There was obviously a lot of ugly things in a broadcast that features the Leafs losing 7-2 in Phil Kessel's first trip back to Boston but one we could both agree on was that Mike Milbury's presence was the straw that broke the camel's back. How bad was it? Godd Till actually wrote a post about how it made him realise Pierre McGuire's genius. Put aside the fact that the very idea of having him present his opinions on anything related to the NHL is laughable.

Till: And what the fuck was with having Mike Milbury in the booth? That POS defended Wheeler on that play.

PPP: WASN'T THAT PAINFUL?

Till: Fuck, Hughson and Simpson are bad enough but that addition was so fucking bad.

PPP: Yeah, it was disgusting.

Till: Hmm, let's put a grating loudmouth Bruins homer in the booth.

PPP: Yeah, this is genius. Ok, next we're going to put a West Coaster with an inferiority complex about Toronto.

Till: Check!

PPP: And some twit that didn't want to play in Toronto because he was a pussy.

Till: GREATTTTT IDEA!

PPP: This is going to be awesome
/scribbles HNiC script

Till: THE TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS ARE PROUD TO SELECT, FROM SASKATOON OF THE WHL, D WENDEL CLARK! FUCK YOU SIMPSON! 

PPP: THEN FUCKING BENEDICT CHERRY WEARS A FUCKING BROOONS TIE!

Thanks to a quirk in the schedule the Maple Leafs are back in Boston on Thursday night for a rematch. This is probably a great thing for Phil Kessel in terms of facing a pressure-packed environment. It also lets the Leafs work on the things that killed them on Saturday night: their lack of attention to detail, their lack of offensive desire, and their lack of passion. The one advantage they have is that the Bruins won't be getting shellacked by the Habs Wednesday night because anyone that watched Friday's 100th anniversary game knew what was going to happen:

The Bruins are going to be flying tomorrow night. Freaking bums

- Some Guy On Twitter

God, I hate it when randoms on Twitter are right.

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Pension Plan Puppets

You must be a member of Pension Plan Puppets to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Pension Plan Puppets. You should read them.

Join Pension Plan Puppets

You must be a member of Pension Plan Puppets to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Pension Plan Puppets. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9355_tracker