He'll Have That Scar on His Chin Forever

I would find a way to have sex with that Cup. Yes, I said it. I love it that much.

1.

2. I always loved the “Chance May Never Come Again” that CBC had on their playoff montages. I’d use Burrows OT goal, the Hawks OT goal vs. the Wings, Cleary’s goal in Game 7 vs the Ducks, and Varlamov’s incredible save to name a few,

3. I wouldn’t put him in but the Hall of Fame has become so diluted in terms of prestige he probably will get in

4. I want Pittsburgh to win but I think the Wings will take it. Zetterberg gets the Conn Smythe and Fleury chokes to blow the Pens chances.

5. I haven’t given up on that dream yet.

1. role player on a winner. I’ve been a star on shitty teams and it sucks even though you’re potting goals left right and centre.
2. Like a blooper reel? I love that idea. Cam Ward’s fluffed catch from game three would definitely be front and centre.
3. He’ll make it in because his numbers (three/four cups, 400 wins) but I find it hilarious that Red Wings fans can’t accept that he is not an elite goalie. He is good enough to put up great numbers behind one of the best hockey teams ever but when he didn’t play for a juggernaut he sucked. What does that tell you? Good luck arguing with Red Wings fans though. Stupid doesn’t even begin to describe most of them (SkinnyFish and my cousin excluded)
4. Red Wings – Henrik Zetterberg – Hal Gill I bet which makes me sad. Although, the more I think about it, I’d prefer Osgood letting in an Osgood classic (red-line clapper) in OT that costs the Wings the Cup. Actually, screw it, Pal Hall Pall is right. I want the Penguins to win because SCREW CHRIS OSGOOD.
5. Let all of the little cousins take turns winning it via various competitions, eat out of it (after cleaning it VERY VERY CAREFULLY – Stupid Kris Draper), and then make it the centre point of a menage-a-trois.

1. A little torn on this. Or course I want to say “bad player on a good team” because everyone wants to win and have success. But, in the end, it’s about money. Gotta go with “good player on a bad team”. Should get paid nicely for being good, and I’m getting ice time and playing a game I love for money.

2. No loser video will ever top this… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NU_RCwy7fi4&feature=fvsr

3. Don’t think so. Just because you’ve won four cups doesn’t mean you belong in the Hall of Fame. I wouldn’t put Robert Horry in the NBA hall of fame and he’s won 7 rings.

4. Wings will win. Osgood wins Conn Smythe, and Fleury lets in a couple softies.

5. Probably do the whole “party with the family and close friends at the house” thing.

1. Hmmm. Good question. Possibly bad player on a good team because I don’t think I could take it if I was the best player on team that consistently loses. I’d probably beat up reporters and throw things at fans that mocked me.

2. Oooooh. Um. Alfredsson being KO’d by Bell… or is this a playoff mocktage? Then I’d have to think about it more.

3. Yes. I don’t like it, but I think you have a hard time keeping Osgood out if he gets another (what, 3rd?) cup ring.

4. Ugh, well I’m really hoping for Pittsburgh. I think Crosby’s going to come out flying and can see him going home with the Conn Smythe. More realisticly, I see the Wings winning and Zetterberg getting the Conn Smythe, even though he doesn’t deserve it. Fleury is the most likely goat.

5. One day with the cup? Can you marry inanimate objects?

1. The roll I was born for, bad player on a good team. I don’t like losing, so who cares who’s playing, so long as we’re winning.

2. I’d probably use either the Benny Hill song, or the Kaiser Chiefs “Everything is Average Nowadays” if I was going for comic effect. i’d include the Oilers own goal right off the bat, as that’s a fairly iconic playoff miscue. If it were a heartbreaking thing I was going for, I’d probably use the Beatles “I’m a Loser”

3. I think Osgood gets a bad rap. He wasn’t horrible when he played behind the Islanders, but he wasn’t Roy or Hasek-esque either. Of course, hasek could only win a cup behind the Wings, so I guess by that argument, Hasek doesn’t get in either…?

4. Crosby (if he’s not hurt too bad, something’s up with him) was born for moments like this. He’s really changed my opinion of him with his playoff performance. I’d call this his coming out party. The Wings are so deep, but I think of all the guys on that team, Kronwall will be the one to watch. If it moves, he’s gonna hit it. I honestly have NO CLUE as to who’s gonna win this one tonight. Osgood for Smythe…

5. cry…

1. Good on bad team, with one chance at being the other way and winning a championship once.
2. Something with circus and a montage of screw ups and blunders. Maybe even a little Sabotage by the Beastie Boys
3. I imagine he will get in due to the cups and all the wins, but he fits the bad player on a good team, more than a hall of famer. He achieves based on his ability to win the big game and play on one of the finest teams in 20 years. If he’s an islander, he’s already retired and working tv commentator for Nashville (they got him in the expansion draft!)
4. Detriot wins: I like Osgood or Kronvall to get the Conn; if Pittsburgh wins, it’s Malkin or Crosby, and I lean to Malkin
5. Me, the Cup, a big effing boat/yacht party! SKIDOOS and Flippy Floppies! And the Cup is my alcohol holder…thank god it’s cleaned regularly!!!
side note on number 5: the evil in me would etch out the names of all the people I hate on it…but I doubt I’d get away with that

1) Bad player on a shitty team. The path you take doesn’t matter if it ends up with Lord Stanley above your head.

2) The clips: The winning goal and losing team’s reaction for every series thus far. The sound: “Another one bites the dust” by Queen. Also, I quite enjoy this number by Chemmy: OhNoCaps

3) Osgood is definitely in the HHoF. Three, soon to be four (Go Wings!) Cup rings. 2 William M. Jennings. 2 All-Star appearances. 10th all-time in wins.

4) Detroit wins it. Osgood gets the Conn Smythe. Crosby gets the goat horns for not showing up all series.

5) In the morning/afternoon I’d do the charity benefit thing. But at night, I’d be getting drunk off of moonshine from the Lord Stanley’s cup. And to beat PPP, I’d have 2 girls and the cup.

1. Good player on shitty team. Just ‘cause I’ve never been a good player, really, of anything, beginning with “hopscotch”, carrying through pee wee baseball/hockey/soccer etc., and continuing right up to present day videogames, Scrabble and pretty much any form of competition you can dream up.
2. Music: Bad Luck by Social Distortion. For video clips, I wouldn’t limit myself to clips from the actual final; that way Steve Smith’s faux pas would qualify, as would Gretzky’s behind the net goal off Ellet’s skate from ‘93; I’d do a freeze frame and slow zoom on Brett Hull’s skate in Hasek’s crease from ‘99. In the section of the song where the lyrics are

Thirteen’s my lucky number,
To you it means stay inside.

I’d get some footage of Martin Gelinas’ OT goal to eliminate the Leafs in game 6 of the ‘02 Conference final, and specifically footage of Mats’ reaction. I’d crossfade from that footage into footage of the Hawks celebrating their series win over the Canucks this year and Mats not winning again. Lots to work with.

3. He probably gets in. I don’t think he should, but there’s lots of guys in already that shouldn’t be.
4. I am going out on a limb and calling Penguins FTW and Malkin = Conn Smythe. I am really hoping that the Billy Goat is Osgood or Hossa, but anybody wearing a red and white uniform will do. Some of you young whippersnappers around here might not remember the days when the Wings were a hated division rival and we needed plucky performances from guys like Nicky Borschevsky to beat them, but I’m too old too forget.
5. In truth, I’d probably take it to a family function to give my Dad, my brothers, my Father-in-law and my brother-in-law the chance to just hang out and drink beers with the Cup, but this is a fantasy world so I claim the right to pretend I’d take the Cup fishing. My favourite boat partner/fishing buddy is also a long-time hockey teammate and defense partner. I would love to just stick the Cup in the middle of a Powassan, and head out on the lake, just the two of us, to catch our limit with the Cup sitting in the hull between us as we slaughter the bass (and put ‘em right back in – catch and release, y’all!).

sigh

Great post, mf37!!!

1) Ask Marian Hossa in about 5 hours.
2) Song – “Another One Bites The Dust” by Queen, with a remix of “Na NA NA Na…” in the instrumental parts of the song.
3) If Ozzie wins the Conn Smythe I don’t know how you can keep him out.
4) Detroit wins 3-2. Datsyuk, Mule, Stuart, Malkin and Fedotenko with the goals.
Ozzie is the hero. Crosby wears the goat horns for being shut down by Zetterberg again, and he has to start facing the questions of whether he can win the big one (Same as Gretzky did). Hossa has to live with the fact that the Wings carried him for a Ring.
5) Since I won the Cup with the Leafs (my answer, my rules), I would host a block party outside Damien Cox’s front door, and after 5 or 6 beers we would shout obscenitites at his house all day, then I’d get Ron Wilson to call Howard Berger and verbally berate him for an hour.

1. I’d rather be competing with a good team. The question is subjective. If I was in the press box and scratched regularly, then no. I would need to play in some capacity, even if it’s only 6 minutes a night.

2. The OIler’s ‘own goal’ Luongo’s ‘highlights’ in game 7 against Chicago, Hossa in the handshake line – tons to choose from. I don’t know if anyone has mentioned Beck ’I’m a Loser’ song, but i think that fits.

3. The Hall of fame question is a difficult one. If you go by who is already in there, then why not. I am a proponent of establishing a 2-tier HOF – To be nice about it, all the players who should have never gained admittance, and then a Hall of Champions. I would no longer admit anyone who just had a ‘great’ career, only those who truly stood above the others. Does Kirk Maltby get in because he has 4 cups? Not likely.
Through all that gobbledy gook, the answer is no – keep the Hall Osgoodless.

4. Game is over, but to be honest I thought the Wings would win, but I cheered for the Pens. The Conn Smythe was really up for grabs in the final game. Since Pittsburgh won, I guess Malkin is as good a choice as any. He should also get an award for trying to talk to the media.

5. I don’t know, but I would not put it down for one minute… except maybe to pee, even then I might be able to tuck it under one arm or something.