Grabbo gets schooled-a weeble annual
by blue with age on Sep 1, 2009 2:12 PM EDT
11 comments
Grabbo would like to thank all the blogging illuminati who inadvertently (or vertently) contributed to the creation of this annual. Because of the value of his recent contract, our hero is offering this annual free of charge to all who care.
For the uninitiated, Grabbo is a hockey player in a large North American city who wobbles but does not fall down. He works for the forces of all that is good in hockey to prevent a evil plot by left and right breast weebles to establish the pre-eminence of the BHL.
Our story resumes at Grabbo manor.
Grabbo has just returned home after a morning of shilling for large Belarusian blimp manufacturer.
He is relaxing by filling in a crossword puzzle to improve his English.
His peaceful afternoon is interrupted by a communication from Poney's hand. The forces of evil have made a pact with Wanted weeble.
Their joint venture has served to refinance the forces of evil with the help of a new product that is quite popular in certain locales.
Their new tactic is to populate the hockey world with Grabbo replacements and put them in compromising situations.
Though Grabbo is impressed by the hairstyles of certain doubles,
he can't help but notice that they have --- Legs!!! Grabbo and Poney's hand concurr, the asses of evil now included the evil forces of Legotown with their exceptional drafting record, their love of all things octopus and their urban sensibilities.
It seemed that their evil leader, LeggoFraser was back in business.
Luckily, explained Poney's hand, he can be tracked by the corrective lens he affects,
and the distinct smell of his hair tonic.
Grabbo wonders what their next step will be. He explains to Poney's hand that any response by the forces of all that is good in the world will have to wait. Grabbo has received a memo from Burke weeble to report to his office.
Grabbo is surprised by the playoff optimism of the memo and gets very excited about the upcoming season and all his new teammates. Especially all those scandinavian dudes who St-Niklas weeble has convinced to return to their rightful home,
that crazy new back-up goalie, Hamburgler weeble, seen here hoarding puck as he is wont to,
a certain Stepniak weeble,
Destroyer-of-permanent-ability-to-make-the-simple-decision-to-continue-playing-or-not weeble,
and especially all those crazy college kids. He fondly remembered them from his time on another team.
Oh, the hazing rituals,
their solidarity,
and their crazy drinking games.
Ever cognizant of Poney's warnings, Grabbo decides to have someone from the team accompany him on his trip to meet with the boss. Grabbo chooses Mitchell weeble, seen here disguised as Stajan weeble.
While mild mannered in appearance, piss him off and he becomes Cap'n fucking mayhem weeble
who, in the absence of a real captain on his team, dares anyone to challenge his on-ice authority with a simple, yet effective response:
Poney's hand liked the choice. He knew that Grabbo had a weakness for the russian girls,
and was looking for some more loving lovin', along the lines of what another teammate was getting from the fan base.
Though Grabbo suspected these ones were a little top heavy for his standards of equilibrium, he knew all the same that Cap'n fucking mayhem, as team pirate, was well trained to spot a situation suited to the deployment of left breast and right breast weebles' favorite method of exploiting Grabbo's weakness: the poison boobie.
Alas, the trip passed without incident. Safely arrived at the appointed destination, Grabbo and the Cap'n headed to the boss's office.
It was eerily dark, but Grabbo noticed a light switch next to the door.
Grabbo laughed at the joke, it was probably some kind of training exercise. They entered, but this was Nebraska, not Kansas.
The boys helplessly looked on as they saw the asses of evil preparing for the new season.
To be continued....
PensionPlanPuppets.com is a fan community that allows members to post their own thoughts and opinions on the Toronto Maple Leafs and hockey in general. These views and thoughts may not be shared by the editor of PensionPlanPuppets.com.
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Office of Mayhem Evaluation
That’s the sign on the door to Brian Burke’s office.
Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
by PPP on Sep 1, 2009 3:07 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
That’s Scouting. Burke’s would just be The Office of Mayhem, wouldn’t it? There’d be trap doors, secret passageways, a moat, and a team explosion testing facility where he could practice blowing up his team, and then others.
by Fleet Fox on Sep 1, 2009 10:08 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Ah, Grabbo Weeble
How I adore thee!
Being a Leaf fan here requires one to be sufficiently lubricated... and truculent!
by stucky on Sep 1, 2009 3:35 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
BEST WEEBLE EVER.
That fucking LeggoFraser is going to give me nightmares.
Also, medieval porn!
"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09
by kidkawartha on Sep 1, 2009 3:43 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
So, The Faith Tones…. those are guys in drag, right? If not, they are pug fugly
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Albert Einstein
by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 1, 2009 3:52 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Get Jesus to use you
because no one else will
"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."
Albert Einstein
by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 1, 2009 3:52 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
Still the best thing posted in PPP. Great stuff!
Harder, better, faster, stronger because our work is never over.
by Mattblack on Sep 2, 2009 3:17 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
Aside from me, you mean.
"I want a song I don’t want to have sing it
I want your love right now, did you bring it? Did you bring it?"
by Mabel on Sep 2, 2009 1:47 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
You’re third after this and my old FTBs.
Harder, better, faster, stronger because our work is never over.
by Mattblack on Sep 2, 2009 3:17 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs
impressive work and research. Well done!
Making stuff up since real Leafs news is far too depressing. Also rather truculent for a chick.
by loser domi on Sep 13, 2009 8:27 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs
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