Boston Bruins Sign Andy Wozniewski

by Chemmy on Sep 10, 2009 12:22 AM EDT in News

That's right the title isn't a clever joke by me, it's an actual fact. The Boston Bruins have signed Andy "Are you shitting me?" Wozniewski aka. "herpes" because we thought he'd never go away, to a one year contract. In all likelihood he'll only play in Providence but man oh man does he stink. Steve Ludzik agrees with me in this clip, audio NSFW if you work in a Mormon Temple:

Wow. The amazing thing is that "are you shitting me?" is exactly the correct thing to have said having watched Woz play. Boston.com claims that the Woz will be a depth signing, though I'm not convinced the Bruins know what "depth" means if that's the case.

Tweet Comment 24 comments | 0 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

Take that Bruins!

I like to eat the yellow snow behind the zamboni

by Kerry Fraser on Sep 10, 2009 12:42 AM EDT reply actions

thankyouthankyou

for bringing my attention to this clip.

Are you shitting me? Effing hilarious.

by pevans on Sep 10, 2009 12:59 AM EDT reply actions

That’s one of the funniest clips I’ve seen in a while!

Being a Leaf fan here requires one to be sufficiently lubricated... and truculent!

by stucky on Sep 10, 2009 8:31 PM EDT up reply actions

Ludzik is a lot of things, but subtle is not one of them

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 10, 2009 8:39 PM EDT up reply actions

Desperation

Woz as a depth player? How many defenseman will the Bruins carry this year? Twelve?

by RobOuttaSoCal on Sep 10, 2009 1:20 AM EDT reply actions

……hundred?

by lordosis on Sep 10, 2009 7:48 AM EDT up reply actions

…thousand.

Chara and the washed up defensemen. Doesn’t everyone have that read to them before bed as a kid? It’s like a fairy tale.

Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)

by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Sep 10, 2009 8:55 AM EDT up reply actions

The Pens traded career minor league defenseman Danny Richmond to St. Louis for Wozniewski back at the deadline. Wozniewski didn’t seem like much of an upgrade. Whatevs.

But seriously, “a depth signing?”

Follow the Penguins on SBN @ Pensburgh.com and twitter.

by FrankD on Sep 10, 2009 3:55 AM EDT reply actions

Depth for Providence no doubt. The Woz is pretty good in a league where you don’t have to be very good at defending.

Old Guys in Blue and White

by koopa kid on Sep 10, 2009 5:45 AM EDT up reply actions

Historic Depth!!!

Just look at how well these kinds of “depth” signings worked for the Boston baseball team’s pitching rotation…

by Kim Jorn on Sep 10, 2009 8:19 AM EDT reply actions

Flushin' it down the Woz

How far down the depth chart would you have to go for the Woz to be an impact player in the post-season?

Also, where’s the FTB? 8:32AM.

/anxiety sweats, chewing fingernails

by general borschevsky on Sep 10, 2009 8:33 AM EDT reply actions

haha!
seriously, i was jones’in over here.
thankfully, it is up now!

Vintage Leafs Blog

by somny on Sep 10, 2009 8:42 AM EDT up reply actions

Classic!!!!

That is absolutely one of he funniest things I’ve ever heard. I’ve watched it 15 times this morning.

"And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been."

by Leaf of Abstinence on Sep 10, 2009 9:42 AM EDT reply actions

You all laugh

But Pittsburgh acquired the Woz and then won the Cup.

COINCIDENCE???

by Godd Till on Sep 10, 2009 10:30 AM EDT reply actions

They acquired him to be certain he would not be on the ice at critical moments anywhere in the known universe.

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 10, 2009 11:13 AM EDT up reply actions

paul maurice deserved to fired base on the Woz getting ice time alone

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Sep 10, 2009 11:29 AM EDT up reply actions

i still think a pairing of Wizniewski and Wozniewski would be funny…

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Sep 10, 2009 11:30 AM EDT up reply actions

not for Wizniewski

Refusing To Bow To Your Standards Since 2006

by JaredFromLondon on Sep 10, 2009 11:59 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs

hahah

fair enough

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Sep 10, 2009 1:21 PM EDT up reply actions

That made me laugh – rec for you

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 10, 2009 4:26 PM EDT up reply actions

I think this is a great tactical move by Chiarelli. He saw the Leafs’ re-acquisition of a 2nd round pick and raised it with a terribly inept d-man.

Chiarelli is sending a message to Burke – you want Kessel? You’re going to have to talk Woz as part of the package.

It’s like the poison pill/ Jonestown defense of NHL deals.

Bitter Leaf Fan: a life-long Toronto Maple Leafs fan comments on the team, the media and the exasperation...

by mf37 on Sep 10, 2009 2:53 PM EDT reply actions

Oh. Your. God.

You might be onto something. He’s Machiavellian in his genius. It’s the only way to explain accquiring the Woz.

"I want a song I don’t want to have sing it
I want your love right now, did you bring it? Did you bring it?"

by Mabel on Sep 10, 2009 3:17 PM EDT up reply actions

Maybe

They just acquired Woz for the Preseason… if I remember correctly that is the only time he looks like a legit NHL D-man.

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 10, 2009 4:27 PM EDT reply actions

I agree. I remember one pre season where he looked pretty good and I had some hope for him. Then the regular season came and he sucked like Jenna Jameson

by 6rick6 on Sep 11, 2009 12:12 AM EDT up reply actions