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Around SBN: The Animated GIFs Of January

Game Review: TML 10

Summer has given way to fall this week and obviously that means a couple of important things. One is: VAMPIRE MOVIES!!1! The other is new hockey video games! And until they can merge my two faves (online screenname: PhaneufBiter69), I'll have to settle for one or the other. To that end I want to review the newest game out there: TML 10! 

He_score_he_shoot_tml_10_medium

Exploding out of the gate TML 10 is the best TML to come out in years. At least  the best since the pre-lockout TML 04. For those of us who've suffered through the versions since that time it appears to have been worth the wait.

Star-divide

While the gameplay is top notch, the real draw here is the GM Franchise mode, where you play as Brian "That's Mr. Brian Burke" Burke, a hard-nosed Rhode Island Red with a long memory, a short fuse, and deep, deep scowl lines. The Burke character, working from an engine borrowed from "Genghis Khan" and "The Second World War", is a welcome change from past years as things in TML 10 have actually changed.

In TML 10, every skill, like skating speed and shooting accuracy, is attached to sliders. This allows Burke to dial them up or down. All except the "Fighting" skill which has its gauge locked at 100%. When this skill is in effect, the player has to fight and beat the Jesus Christ out of the opponent and if you don't the Burke character shuts your game down and you have to go back to playing Conker's Bad Fur Day.

After you've done an on-ice game, you as Burke have to play a "Scrum". In this game, you are surrounded by the worst lazy questions the Toronto media can lob at you. By aggressively repeating the sequence of X B X Y, you make Howard Berger piss his pants and run out of the locker room. This gets you an ovation from your players and 1,000,000 extra points.

It's still early, but I''ve loved what I've seen and played. It'll be an exciting game to play for the next 9 months. Overall rating: 8.5/10.

* Rated 'T' for Truculence. Not available in Eastern Ontario.

Comment 28 comments  |  1 recs  | 

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I MUST PLAY THIS GAME

"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...

by blurr1974 on Sep 24, 2009 11:28 AM EDT reply actions  

Not available in Eastern Ontario.*

*The Office of the Ontario Minister of Health strongly cautions Senators fans to avoid this game as, during early testing, various side-effects such as fainting, crying, bleeding, weeping and finally unconsciousness followed by trade demands have been observed.

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 24, 2009 11:35 AM EDT reply actions  

holy crap

i think you’re onto something.

Heatley didn’t ask for a trade because Clouston wanted him to backcheck. He saw what Burke was building and realized there was no way in hell he’d retire from hockey with the ability to walk, or any of his natural teeth. facing the Leafs 8 times a year.

Heatley’s the smart one…

"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...

by blurr1974 on Sep 24, 2009 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions  

He might have some of his natural teeth. In a bag.

That’s Orr-al hygiene for you.

Can it before I drive this truculence through your faceulence and put you in an ambulance.

by Brunswick Bruiser on Sep 24, 2009 11:43 AM EDT up reply actions  

I like that. “Orr-al” hygiene. Except you need to add one more “L”, because if you piss him off, ALL your teeth are coming out. I can see him doing to ads for the Canadian Dental Health Association-

Take good care of your teeth- don’t fight with Colton Orr.

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 24, 2009 12:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

NuVampires blow.

Give me good ol’ snagglytooth Nosferatu.

Can it before I drive this truculence through your faceulence and put you in an ambulance.

by Brunswick Bruiser on Sep 24, 2009 11:42 AM EDT reply actions  

It should noted that the ‘X B X Y Howard Berger’ easter egg only works from Nov 1 until Nov 30.

by RepressedOptimism on Sep 24, 2009 12:04 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Why only then?

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 24, 2009 12:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

;)

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 24, 2009 12:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

In this game, you are surrounded by the worst lazy questions the Toronto media can lob at you.

Hilarious. No release date?

by Connie Kim on Sep 24, 2009 1:00 PM EDT reply actions  

Oh, it’s out. But hurry, this one’s going to be popular so act now!

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 1:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

I forgot to pre-order, will there be a copy for me?

Pension Plan Puppets*
* Blog contains less than 2% puppet content by weight.

by Chemmy on Sep 24, 2009 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

Oh jeez, I sent a box to the PPP offices. You didn’t get one?

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

/seling copies on the black market

Huh? No, we didn’t get any deliveries.

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Sep 24, 2009 2:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

I’ve noticed a pattern about when you comment…

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Sep 24, 2009 1:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

You are speaking to me?

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 1:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

who are you?

Refusing To Bow To Your Standards Since 2006

by JaredFromLondon on Sep 24, 2009 1:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

No

The reply is to Connie Kim

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Sep 24, 2009 2:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

and the pattern is...?

i’m thinking it’s that she comments here every two weeks or so

"Sanity is not statistical." - George Orwell, a Leafs fan...
Stalk me here...

by blurr1974 on Sep 24, 2009 2:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, AND she’s into the Kings. Christ.

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 2:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

lolz

And the colour green…

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.

by PPP on Sep 24, 2009 2:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

“colour”?

Silly Canadian.

by Connie Kim on Sep 24, 2009 3:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

queens own english mum

pip pip pip

Refusing To Bow To Your Standards Since 2006

by JaredFromLondon on Sep 24, 2009 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

meat and two veg, bag of crisps, cherio!

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 24, 2009 7:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

SHRIMP ON THE BARBIE!

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 7:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

in soviet russia, shrimp barbies you!

Refusing To Bow To Your Standards Since 2006

by JaredFromLondon on Sep 24, 2009 7:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah PPP, just who are you?

He Score, He Shoot! Number To Be Retired After Illustrious Career

by Greener on Sep 24, 2009 1:19 PM EDT reply actions  

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