Goaltending: Life On The Streets

by Mattblack on Sep 27, 2009 6:29 AM EDT in From The Branches

Fade up to a grimy street corner at night, somewhere in North America in 2014. Enter hotshot investigative reporter, Guy Smiley.

"Life on the streets. It's a tough world out here. Crime, narcotics, rum, sodomy and the lash." He encounters a strangely well-dressed man of the streets. "Young man, may we speak to you for a while?

He replies he heavily accented English "Ah....sure. You're not from The Star are you?"

"No, we're making a documentary about how people come to be in your unfortunate position."

"I remember it like it was yesterday. Like it was contents of my old manbag. He gets a little tearful here, but holds it together. That damn Monster. Who knew a human being could cover those sorts of angles? Who knew a man's leg could suddenly be 8 feet long? He robbed Ryno and robbed me of my dignity at the same time. Now all I have is my patch here on the street and my chats with Raycroft at the municipal dump."

"Are you.....Vesa Toskala?"

"I WAS Vesa Toskala. Now I am Kalevala, king of the kerbside! Could you spare me a dollar for a Moebius scarf?"

"Urgh, get a job you freeloading mooch! Smiley exits, stage left.

Only one place to start today - THAT SAVE. Maple Leaf Hot Stove and Fallen Leafs cover the main event, as Toronto Mike has a quick look at some of the great Monsters of history.
Not all bad news for the Vesa however, Dr Steve fights his corner here and also foresees a decent season for the Marlies.
With a measly four and a bit days before the first puck drops in anger, Toronto Sports Media merely wishes to state 'Bring it on'.
Somny's Vintage Leafs are back, featuring a little old time fist talk.
Truculeafs has their take on who makes the cut this year.
And finally, our good friend of the show and my Euro compatriot Sleza previews the Southeast division in her own inimitable style.
LAKE BREAKING NEWS - Archi might get a bit tearful on not being included first time round, but he's the only one who can breakdown hockey players in their whistles. So have at it, blubbermouth.

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The church will be open a little late today as yours truly was at his brother’s football game in the next town over last night (they won). Upon arriving home I witnessed the Monster’s monstrosity and was unable to concentrate on anything else for over an hour. Finally, I spent some time talking to a very interesting young lady who happens to be a Leafs fan.

Can it before I drive this truculence through your faceulence and put you in an ambulance.

by Brunswick Bruiser on Sep 27, 2009 9:28 AM EDT reply actions

It’s up now.

Can it before I drive this truculence through your faceulence and put you in an ambulance.

by Brunswick Bruiser on Sep 27, 2009 10:15 AM EDT up reply actions

I laaaaaiiiike it.

No I don’t. I love it.

jrwendelman
The Artist Formerly Known as "Junior", who blogs at heroesinrehab.ca/blog

"But if someone so eager to engage into fist talk, we can always meet after season end in Minsk." (Mikhail Grabovski and a well-meaning but not particularly skillful translator)

by jrwendelman on Sep 27, 2009 9:34 AM EDT via mobile reply actions

I am REALLY getting sick of people saying the Leafs are just tough and have no skill.

really, its starting to piss me off

Refusing To Bow To Your Standards Since 2006

by JaredFromLondon on Sep 27, 2009 10:06 AM EDT reply actions

Sounds like you want to go ‘skill’ on their asses

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Sep 27, 2009 10:50 AM EDT up reply actions

Truculize their faces!

Life as a Toronto Sports Fan?... *sigh*... It is what it is...

by JohnnyG on Sep 27, 2009 10:58 AM EDT up reply actions

27 Goals For this pre-season, tied for most…doesn’t seem like a lack of skill

by WendelMadeMe on Sep 27, 2009 12:17 PM EDT up reply actions

Let's not jump the gun too quick...

I’m gonna be “that guy” today and tell everyone to hold off on jerkin it to their fave photo of the Monster.

This young man has 60 minutes of preseason NHL experience. That’s all. I know we’re all starved for success, but maybe we should wait just a little bit longer before we declare him the savior.

Stalberg on the other hand…

by birky on Sep 27, 2009 11:21 AM EDT reply actions

Give it up, birky. The gun has been jumped, mauled, stripped and robbed of it’s dignity. :) The Monster train left “Rational Station” a long time ago, and even I find myself watching that video over and over in a daze. It really is an archival moment in the history of the Leafs.

"We've had an ongoing problem with Grabovski this year." Bob Gainey, 4/04/09

by kidkawartha on Sep 27, 2009 12:16 PM EDT up reply actions

Stålberg

has 7 games of NHL Preseason experience. That’s 3.5 times the experience of Gustavsson (on a games played basis).

He also scores a lot more than Gustavsson which is really the only huge drawback I see to his game. If he could put more pucks in the other team’s net I’d be more than happy to name him captain, and future Leaf hall of famer.

"Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm."

- Sir Winston Churchill

I'm pretty sure he's talking about the Leafs.

by Steve Burtch on Sep 27, 2009 11:31 AM EDT reply actions