Maple Leafs at Devils

That handsome fellow pictured above will get the start which means that the fighting men and women of Canada will likely be fed a steady diet of goals Saturday night when Vesa Toskala gets the start. I don't have much to say about the game other than to point out this fact:

Two seasons ago the Maple Leafs went 0-4-0 against the Devils scoring only 6 goals in the process. Last year they went 3-0-1 on the back of 15 goals for. I would expect tonight to look a lot more like 2007-2008 than 2008-2009. Anyway, here's some required reading before tonight's game:

• Five Questions with John Fischer shows that maybe the Jersey stereotype isn't universal.
• The comprehensive preview of the game on In Lou We Trust puts Chemmy's shoddy work to shame.
• I answer five questions for New Jersey Devils fans without once adding in a "badabing!" and yes, I count that as a failure on my part
• If you haven't wished Chemmy congratulations on his nuptials yet do so now. SkinnyFish is currently on location working to ensure that Chemmy's fiancee cannot back out. He's yours now sucker!

And finally, I picked up a book called The Silver Linings Playbook by Matthew Quick which seems to be a book about a guy that lost his wife and went insane. Obviously, I could relate. The guy looks for the silver lining in everything so in honour of the book here is tonight's silver lining:

This game puts the Leafs one step closer to the trade deadline which means they are one step closer to shedding some bums which means they are one step closer to July 1st which means they are one step closer to shedding the rest of the bums and signing non-bum-like players which means they are one step closer to icing a competitive team which means one they are step closer to making the PLAYOFFS!!1 which means one they are step closer to winning their first playoff game since April 2004 which means that they are one step closer to inevitably eliminating the s*nators from the playoffs again which means that they are one step closer to being rested for their second round series which means that they are one step closer to winning the Eastern Conference which means that they are one step closer to beating whichever Western Conference team crawls out of their brutal side of the bracket which means that they are one step closer to winning the Stanley Cup that will let us all die in peace.

So while you're watching Jamal Mayers and Garnet Exelby raise their trade value (LOLZ!) keep that thought in mind and smile. Sure, it's shit now but it can't be shit forever. Mostly because we'll all benefit from the sweet, sweet release of death before living forever.