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Why I love PPP

 

 

 I have lots of friends that purport to be Leaf fans. They care about the Leafs. They watch every game. They know nothing about hockey.

"Mats Sundin Sucks"...."McCabe is better than Kaberle"...."I bought a Raycroft jersey" ..."Kyle Welwood looks in great shape"...

For a long time I tolerated this. I knew no better anyway. Before the internet my outlets for Leaf talk were pathetically limited. An old neighbour down the street who's analysis only ever consisted of "well they could be good this year, I like player X, but you know....nahhh..they're not going anywhere." He was constantly impressed that I knew who Bobby Orr and Gordie Howe were consideing I was so young. Seriously? Yes.

 

My other outlet was my friends. They are hockey morons. However, a reneissance approached after the jump.

Star-divide

    I started off talking hockey on comment sections of newspaper or television sites. Boy, I thought my friends were bad, but these guys were shockingly ridiculous! I didn't last very long. Trying to argue your point on the internet is obviously akin to headbutting a brontosaurus to death. I eventually gave up. I went back to talking hockey with myself. Cursing Damien Cox in solitude thinking I must be crazy. Thinking Kypreos is the worst TV personality ever while my friends would respond with "meh.. I like Kypreos", made me think I was the moron.

One day about a year and a half ago I decided to search for "Maple Leafs blog". I wasn't really sure what I was looking for but I wanted to read something  other than the mainstream media. The first few clicks were bad. The blogs were last updated 12-18 months ago. They were devoid of any good content. Somewhere around the 3rd try I clicked on some long domain name I didn't quite read very well. It was pensionplanpuppets.com.

My memory fails me on what was being posted at that time I do remember Luke the saviour posts and general Luke Schenn worship the likes of which I wasn't prepared for. However as I read more I finally found what i'd been looking for since I first saw a Leaf game in 1989 and became an insta-fan. Analysis, reason, humour, understanding, hockey knowledge, insider knowledge, statistics I've never heard of in my life before.

From here I found DGB I got sucked into the Barlikosphere. I read my first Kyle Welwood is fat articles. I found the Wendel all heart video. I masturbated for months. Here I found people who think like me. I also found people who think differently and are able to articulate it and make me see things differently. You've opened my hockey mind.

For a while I thought about writing my own blog. Now I know I don't need to. I could never top this and I don't want to.

Being a Leafs fan can really be depressing sometimes...or always... regardless finding a site like this makes it a lot easier. You guys have my respect. All that post here. This is a great community. I only registered a few days ago after lurking for a long time. I made some posts and felt welcomed as if I was always here.

The title FanPost fits this perfectly. I am a fan of PPP and everyone that posts here. Thank you.

PensionPlanPuppets.com is a fan community that allows members to post their own thoughts and opinions on the Toronto Maple Leafs and hockey in general. These views and thoughts may not be shared by the editor of PensionPlanPuppets.com.

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I am biased

so I think PPP is the best! And the Godfather is a great guy! I can vouch for that.

by leosc on Feb 11, 2010 8:42 PM EST reply actions  

I masturbated for months.

I’m glad these forums are online

We require, as a team, proper levels of pugnacity, testosterone, truculence and belligerence.
DION F*****G PHANEUF

by Belligerent Burkie on Feb 11, 2010 10:56 PM EST reply actions  

That’s wayyyy too much information Chuck… but hey I’m glad you like it here. I like this site a lot too, and there are lots of other great blogs in the Barilkosphere.

leaf fan stuck in ottawa, a localized black hole that will suck everything in that area to oblivion.

by stucky on Feb 12, 2010 12:29 AM EST up reply actions  

Heh

I think it was figurative

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Like reading thoughts confined to 140 characters? I'm on Twitter too.

by PPP on Feb 12, 2010 12:33 AM EST up reply actions  

Good call, sir. I’m going to go with that explanation as well.

leaf fan stuck in ottawa, a localized black hole that will suck everything in that area to oblivion.

by stucky on Feb 12, 2010 12:44 AM EST up reply actions  

Sounded to me like it was triggered by Wellwood.

by not norm ullman on Feb 12, 2010 3:31 AM EST up reply actions  

now that this site is sponsored by KY I think it all makes perfect sense.

by Chuck Diesel on Feb 12, 2010 5:19 PM EST up reply actions  

Glad you came into the light :) and have enjoyed it so far!

Pension Plan Puppets: A Toronto Maple Leafs blog and a group therapy session.
Like reading thoughts confined to 140 characters? I'm on Twitter too.

by PPP on Feb 11, 2010 11:13 PM EST reply actions  

Sorry to burst your bubble,

but the brontosaurus was determined to in fact be the same creature as the apatosaurus; and for some reason paleontologists decided to use the name apatosaurus to describe the species. When you translate apatosaurus from Latin into English, it rougly translates to “Kyle Wellwood”.

I've always wanted to be a PPP Princess. You see kids, you can be anything you want to be; so long as Jay Leno doesn't also want to be that.

by SkinnyFish on Feb 12, 2010 9:36 AM EST reply actions  

I think in Pittsburghian it translates to “Bill Guerin”—at least, brontosaurus does.

Ovechkin = Green Backs

by red army line on Feb 21, 2010 12:07 PM EST up reply actions  

Why I love PPP?

Cuz he is so sweet and cuddly…
What? Oh you meant the site…..

Fairweather fans can go to hell

by leafer1984 on Feb 12, 2010 9:47 AM EST reply actions  

he is adorable too

Puns, Innuendo and Bad Spelling, Yes We Got That

by JaredFromLondon on Feb 12, 2010 10:57 AM EST up reply actions  

He really is

I just want to hug him again

Willing to trade humour for cash, straight up.

by Archimedies on Feb 13, 2010 3:52 PM EST up reply actions  

I want to share a back seat of a car with him again on a road trip. Snuggle Time!!

A Nation of Masochists Waiting is the hardest part.

by furcifer on Feb 14, 2010 1:03 PM EST up reply actions  

You took the words out of my mouth, its like you read my mind. I came across this site and DGB pretty much the same way, and had to have double wrist surgery after finding the all heart video.

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Feb 12, 2010 10:52 AM EST reply actions   1 recs

o_0

I've always wanted to be a PPP Princess. You see kids, you can be anything you want to be; so long as Jay Leno doesn't also want to be that.

by SkinnyFish on Feb 12, 2010 11:10 AM EST up reply actions  

..err, was trying to make a joke about the whole beating off to the all heart vid….

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Feb 12, 2010 1:14 PM EST up reply actions  

0_o

I've always wanted to be a PPP Princess. You see kids, you can be anything you want to be; so long as Jay Leno doesn't also want to be that.

by SkinnyFish on Feb 12, 2010 1:18 PM EST up reply actions  

_;

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Feb 12, 2010 4:08 PM EST up reply actions  

gah

<( " )>

There is no "I" in team, but there is an "M" and an "E"

by Matt_Roberts on Feb 12, 2010 4:08 PM EST up reply actions  

Did you also go to Dr. Ogelvie?

by Chuck Diesel on Feb 12, 2010 5:20 PM EST up reply actions  

I was referred by a friend

Thank goodness!

"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."

Albert Einstein

by Say *plan the parade one more time*... on Feb 12, 2010 11:58 AM EST reply actions  

I have lots of friends that purpotrate to be Leaf fans.

perpetrate: to produce, perform or execute
purport: conveyed, professed, or implied
purpotrate: not a word

I believe you mean purport. Interesting sticking two words together though. :)

by CanadianMaple09 on Feb 12, 2010 12:31 PM EST reply actions  

there you go i learned something today. Thanks Professor Maple :)

by Chuck Diesel on Feb 12, 2010 5:17 PM EST up reply actions  

penetrate: To enter or force a way into; pierce. (see KY Jelly, helpful aids)

I am Mikhail Grabovski's smirking revenge.

by kidkawartha on Feb 12, 2010 5:25 PM EST up reply actions  

Sorry I'm late...

Moles move slow

“From here I found DGB I got sucked into the Barlikosphere. I read my first Kyle Welwood is fat articles. I found the Wendel all heart video. I masturbated for months.”

Fuckin’ hilarious

“Trying to argue your point on the internet is obviously akin to headbutting a brontosaurus to death.”

Hilarious x2

PS. Your analysis of the Kessel trade is the best I’ve heard. Really swayed me…so yeah Thanks to you too

Wendel Killer Joseph

by MapleLeafMole on Feb 16, 2010 1:31 PM EST reply actions  

Thanks Dude. I’m glad you liked it.

by Chuck Diesel on Feb 18, 2010 6:51 PM EST up reply actions  

this post could not be more relevant for me than after such a horrible (well, not really) experience last night with three so-called Leafs fans. We were watching the Canada/Norway game and they went on and on about Burke not being a good GM, the Kubina trade being a flop because XLB sucks (to which I mentioned a cap-dump scenario allowing Beauch and Komi to get signed), the Kessel deal not panning out (Fuck, seriously!!), Phaneuf’s contract, and the thing that bothered me the most, they claimed that Kulemin is not a hard working forward, who has no potential. They also claimed that hewho would have been traded by now if he had any value whatsoever… Holy hell, at that point I was just shaking my head in disbeleaf… I was in need of some Barilkosphere support…

needless to say, I too am glad that this site exists, I found it last summer and lurked on it till whenever-the-fuck-month that I decided to join in, and haven’t looked back since (TSN boards and other forums were just not for me)…

...Being surrounded by Sens and Habs fans makes me lose faith in humanity...

by El Monstruo on Feb 17, 2010 11:34 AM EST reply actions  

The Kulemin comments woulda put me over the edge too. Those guys were in need of a serious beating.

by Chuck Diesel on Feb 18, 2010 6:56 PM EST up reply actions  

Man, had Grabbo been in that bar with me, it would have been ON!!

...Being surrounded by Sens and Habs fans makes me lose faith in humanity...

by El Monstruo on Feb 24, 2010 1:34 PM EST up reply actions  

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