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Hockey Night in Pennsylvania

Get ready for it, there's more than one Staal in this game and it isn't pond hockey at the Staal's house. Did you know that Jordan Staal and Eric Staal are brothers? Did you know that as brothers they grew up together and share parents? Did you know their two team are playing against each other? Did you know that Pittsburgh drafted Jordan Staal ahead of Jonathan Toews which is why the city of Chicago sends the Penguins a fruit basket every year at draft time?

Get ready for the Titans of Tank to take on the Southern Belles in what's sure to be a completely unwatchable mess by the time NBC and Doc Emrick finish furiously jerking themselves off about the Staal storyline and how handsome Sidney Crosby is. If you're in Canada, and for your sake I hope you are, replace Doc Emrick and NBC with "all Pierre McGuire, all the time".

In college a Habs fan friend of mine told me about a playoff game broadcast during a labor strike that had no commentary, just the video feed of the game and the sounds of the Forum. Am I the only one who would literally pay money for every hockey game to be broadcast that way?