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Guide To The Playoffs: Phoenix Coyotes

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The Toronto Maple Leafs have left their fans without a rooting interest past the middle of April for the 6th Spring in a row. The league kicked in one more Spring possibly as part of some sort of promotion. Anyway, we here at PPP Amalgamated Heavy Industries, Kitten Ranch, Pug Manufacturing, and Phantasy Sports Conglomerate want nothing more than to help Leafs fans in their time of need as they struggle to find a team to support.

The Case Against Phoenix

Dey took err team! Free tickets with vodka, that troublesome government 'watchdog', that asshole Lee Stempniak, and attendance issues.

The Case For Phoenix

Throw.The.Snake. As a fanbase, they took Chemmy's idea for responding to Wings fans' obsession with octopi and ran with it. They aren't many (yet!) but they are passionate. They have no history of screwing the Leafs over and we can probably give them credit for gifting us Dave Ellett. Also, the only Coyotes fan I really know is a great guy. Plus, who wants Detroit getting closer to our 13? No one. Oh, and BizNasty.

The Sales Pitch

2 reasons to root for the Coyotes: #throwthesnake and the Detroit Red Wings are horrible people. Oh and a third just for good measure, Share (edit: we think he means Shane) Doan is awesome.

- Travis Hair, Five For Howling

This just really made me laugh