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As Expected Leafs Land Best Coach In League

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Was there ever any doubt?

Look at this face. What do you see Dad?
Look at this face. What do you see Dad?
Rob Grabowski-USA TODAY Sports

It seems laughable to look back on this morning's swirling rumors and speculation as anything other than the last gasps of Leafs haters suddenly realizing what's coming like a fish yanked out of the water laying on its side in a boat.

Why wouldn't the Leafs, the greatest and handsomest team in the whole world, sign Mike Babcock? Where else would he sign? Detroit is a crumbling warzone propped up solely by Little Caesar's Pizza and Buffalo is home to 1.2 million people who wished they could move somewhere else.

The Leafs have signed Babcock to an eight year $50M deal, which would be important if MLSE didn't have a big roll of $100 bills taped together to use as toilet paper on their private jet. There's no salary cap and I don't have season tickets or use products from Bell and/or Rogers so best of luck to any of you who do.

Is Mike Babcock the perfect fit? Will Mike Babcock single handedly win the Leafs the Cup? Will Mike Babcock ruin the Leafs' outright tanking? Who knows.

What I do know is that Mike Babcock is the best coach in the whole damn world and now he's a Leaf.