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Get to know PPP: PhyllisKessel13

With so many new faces here at Pension Plan Puppets, we're going to use the off-season to introduce ourselves.

Tom Szczerbowski-USA TODAY Sports

Scott Wheeler told me that if I answered these questions in the next 24 hours and passed it on to ten friends, my crush would finally confess his love to me. If I didn't, my crush would never speak to me again.*

Still crossing my fingers that I hear from Duncan Keith.

Is your name really Phyllis Kessel?

Sadly no, my parents didn't anticipate Phil and named me Katie instead. Contrary to popular belief, I am not, in fact, Katie Flynn. I know that we have never been seen together, but I promise you, we are not the same person. Neither of us are Batman.

What are three words that your friends would use to describe you?

I say "Magic Mike enthusiast."

I asked @GrinWithGuilt and she said "wears ModCloth dresses."

How did you become a Leafs fan?

The attitude that "women aren't really sports fans" never made sense to me because I became a Leafs fan a long time ago through one of my older sisters (I have four older sisters, and two are Leafs fans). We would sit around and watch the Leafs in the days of Pat Quinn and the good ol' Muskoka Five, laughing at silly things like Mats Sundin's Campbell's Soup commercial and Darcy Tucker's unhinged stare.

To this day, my family bonds through the Leafs. I've lived in the U.S. for a few years because of grad school, and being able to watch the Leafs from far away makes me feel closer to home. I can text my Dad and we can fight about if Tyler Bozak is really a first line centre (a recurring argument).

I was Skyping with that sister and my nephews during the game 7 that I don't like to talk about, which made the experience even worse because I had to watch the look on my nephews' faces as they realized that the world really is just a horrible place.

What do you do on PPP?

I've been writing for the blog for one horrific season (the season, not the blogging).

I mostly write FTBs where I aim to amuse myself, and I can also be found contributing to pun threads or musing about how many things sound like my last date. The other writers for this site can (and do!) contribute much more to hockey discourse than I can or should.

Another strength of mine is writing articles that inspire people to create SB Nation accounts to tell me that they didn't like the article. I also distract Scott Wheeler by writing page-long paragraphs that he is forced to edit into two sentence paragraphs. It may seem like I spend all of my time writing thinkpieces about hockey players' butts, but that's not true! Only about a quarter of my time goes to that project.

More seriously, as a grad student I study sport, health, and the body from a sociocultural perspective (that's the simple explanation at least). Sometimes I write about those things here, like in this article where I described my master's thesis project on the gendering of sports fandom, or here where Achariya and I wrote about media depictions of female athletes. I was also one of the authors of the (Too) Frequently Asked Questions About Sexism and the NHL article.

I can usually be found making Zach Hyman jokes though (interesting fact: I used to teach a university course on sexual health).

When you aren't writing for PPP, what do you do?

In my spare time I enjoy "accidentally" tweeting direct messages to Joffrey Lupul to build my brand as someone that Joffrey Lupul would actually talk to. I also listen to a lot of Taylor Swift.

I have a dog named Chase who is one of the handsomest dogs of all time. I enjoy putting him in a Leafs jersey, although he does not enjoy this and always looks sad when I do. We watch a lot of games together, which he also doesn't enjoy because there's too much angry shouting and sadness. My Twitter account is mostly dedicated to photos of him.

*None of this happened.