> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://www.pensionplanpuppets.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # A Brain Aneurysm In 5 Minutes Or Less Or Your Money Back - URL: https://www.pensionplanpuppets.com/a-brain-aneurysm-in-5-minutes-or-less-or-your-money-back/ - Published: 2012-01-19T12:02:10.000Z - Updated: 2012-01-19T12:02:10.000Z - Author: J.P. Nikota - Tags: From The Branches, #chorus, #Import 2023-04-05 11:43 Hey all, just in case you're in the mood to laugh *and* make your brain bleed this morning, I'd suggest you check out [@AskBrianBurke](https://twitter.com/?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com#!/AskBrianBurke). You see, if I ever attempted to compile a list of 140-character "thoughts" that encapsulated what it meant to be the dumbest hockey fans in the universe, I don't know if I could do this good a job. It seems that our dear friend @AskBrianBurke has taken to re-tweeting the worst/best questions for the Leafs' GM he can possibly find. Here's a choice example: ![Screen_shot_2012-01-19_at_12](http://assets.sbnation.com/assets/885375/Screen_shot_2012-01-19_at_12.21.20_AM_medium.png) I wouldn't be in the least bit surprised to learn that this account is being run by one of our very own PPP users, so stand up and take a bow if it's you. There's a quote from Clerks that I've been instructed to use here, despite the fact that I've never seen the movie: > This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers. Yeah, that's probably crossed Brian Burke's mind more than once. Jump for your links. **Leafs Links:** [The Unbearable Lightness of Being a Bubble Team](http://theleafsnation.com/2012/1/18/the-unbearable-lightness-of-being-a-bubble-team?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Preach on, Danny Gray. From The Leafs Nation. [What’s the next move with Nazem Kadri?](http://vintageleafmemories.blogspot.com/2012/01/whats-next-move-with-nazem-kadri.html?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Michael Langlois has his say at Vintage Leaf Memories. [Dion Phaneuf can't fight in that situation](http://theleafsnation.com/2012/1/18/dion-phaneuf-cant-fight-in-that-situation?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Personally, I'm OK with it, but Cam Charron has other ideas at The Leafs Nation. [State of Brian Burke’s Leafs](http://hockeyanalysis.com/2012/01/18/state-of-brian-burkes-leafs/?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Better than last year. From David Johnson at Hockey Analysis. [NHL denies Winter Classic deal is done](http://www.theglobeandmail.com/sports/hockey/nhl-denies-winter-classic-deal-is-done/article2306647/?utm%5Fmedium=Feeds%3A%20RSS%2FAtom&utm%5Fsource=Hockey&utm%5Fcontent=2306647) Yeah, well, they also say that the [Phoenix Coyotes](http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/teams/phoenix-coyotes?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) have a future in Arizona. From David Shoalts at the Globe. [Armstrong turns to Crosby, others for concussion advice](http://www.theglobeandmail.com/sports/hockey/leafs-beat/armstrong-turns-to-crosby-others-for-concussion-advice/article2306836/?utm%5Fmedium=Feeds%3A%20RSS%2FAtom&utm%5Fsource=Hockey&utm%5Fcontent=2306836) Boneitis runs rampant. From James Mirtle. [Backhand Shelf Podcast](http://blogs.thescore.com/nhl/2012/01/18/backhand-shelf-podcast-phaneuffoligno-tortorelladolan-and-taylor-halls-face/?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) The Phaneuf/Foligno incident is discussed in this one, though I disagree with what's said about Phaneuf at the end of the game. Oh, and Rob Pizzo finally realizes how fast [Phil Kessel](http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/players/54905/phil-kessel?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) is. [Do The Leafs Really Need A Number One Center?](http://thesilverfoxtoronto.blogspot.com/2012/01/do-leafs-really-really-need-number-one.html?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Andrew Bates at the Silver Fox says 'no'. **Other Hockey Links:** [Surviving the 5 on 6](http://www.coppernblue.com/2012/1/18/2716268/using-the-box-1-while-playing-5-on-6?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) Copper & Blue columnist dawgbone98 with another great breakdown. [Blues sign Brian Elliott to a two-year contract - The Globe and Mail](http://www.theglobeandmail.com/sports/hockey/blues-sign-brian-elliott-to-a-two-year-contract/article2307180/?utm%5Fmedium=Feeds%3A%20RSS%2FAtom&utm%5Fsource=Hockey&utm%5Fcontent=2307180) The $3.6 million deal will pay the 26-year-old Elliott $1.7 million next season and $1.9 million in 2013-14\. He signed a two-way contract this season and is making $600,000. [The Whiteboard](http://blogs.thescore.com/nhl/2012/01/18/the-whiteboard-how-the-perfect-neutral-zone-regroup-is-executed/?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) A man with fourth-grade MS Paint skills (Justin Bourne) teaches us about neutral zone regrouping.