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# Mats Sundin (Retires From/Re-Signs With/Betrays) Maple Leafs
- URL: https://www.pensionplanpuppets.com/mats-sundin-retires-from-r/
- Published: 2008-08-01T10:00:06.000Z
- Updated: 2008-08-01T10:00:06.000Z
- Author: Julian Sanchez
- Tags: #chorus, #Import 2023-04-05 11:01

Today ends months of speculation and countless loss hours as Mats Sundin has decided to **(retire to a life of luxury/return to the NHL)**. After spending hours fishing in his native Sweden the Leafs **(captain/former captain)** decided that he **(had had enough herring for a summer/wanted to keep floating around the fjords)** will be **(picking up the fishing pole full-time/lace 'em up in the fall)**. So come this September Sundin will be in **(familiar surroundings at the Leafs' practice facility/his 25 year old fiancee/a hockey wasteland/a city that loathes foreign leaders)** in a **(familiar/new)** role.

Obviously, not everyone is happy with Mats' decision to **(return to the Leafs/join the rival Habs/disappear in Vancouver/stay in Sweden with his nubile wife-to-be)**. Fans in his **(former/adopted)** hometown reacted as passionately as ever with scenes of **(jubilation/despondency/unchecked rage)** filling the city as fans **(wept/cheered delirilously/joined in mobs)** to **(lament the end of his career/celebrate his return/burn down his house)**.

"Mats is **(the greatest Leaf ever/going to teach the kids how to play/going to pay for this, that f\*cking Judas)**" proclaimed a **(composed/cheerful/insane)** Leafs fan on the waterfront.

Meanwhile, in Montreal fans of Les Habitants reacted to the news with traditional Gallic **(indifference/resignation/arrogance)**. Fans could not believe that their rival's greatest captain had decided to **(return to the Leafs/join Montreal/run away to Vancouver/go home to Sweden)**. When asked to comment further they **(spat on the ground/sneered at Sundin's snub while choking back tears at the realization that they are not a big club/declared themselves 2009 Stanley Cup Champions)**. Bookies have reacted by moving to make the Canadiens favourites to **(come back to earth/lose in the Stanley Cup Finals/remind everyone that they won a tonne of trophies 30 years ago)** over the coming season.

It was a different story on the country's left coast as fans were **(stoned/stunned/stoned)** to hear that Mats had decided to **(rebuild in Toronto/destroy his legacy in Montreal/learn the kama sutra/waste his time in Vancouver)**.

"Dude, wouldn't it be awesome if Mats decided to **(stay with the Leafs/quit the NHL/play with worse forwards/join a flash in the pan team and betraying the feelings of loyalty that he professed repeatedly)**? He did? Whoa....hey, are you going to eat that?"

So, the long national nightmare **(comes to an end/extends for at least one more day/shows no sign of abating)**. Mats took his sweet time getting to the point where he would know whether he would **(play/fish/chase his naked wife around the Swedish countrside/need even more time to confirm the decision that he likely made weeks ago)** but I think that we can all agree that the wait was **(pointless/worth it/too long/fine for the first few days and is not just ridiculous)**. Best of luck to Mats next year as he tries to **(resist the urge to kill Bryan McCabe/resist the urge to kill the Sedin twins/kill himself experimenting with his fiancee/keep his house from being burned down)**.