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# PPP After Dark: Stanley Cup Final Game II - The Wrath of Kessel
- URL: https://www.pensionplanpuppets.com/ppp-after-dark-stanley-cup-final-game-2-penguins-sharks/
- Published: 2016-06-01T22:50:45.000Z
- Updated: 2016-06-01T22:50:45.000Z
- Description: "Ah, Pavelski, my old friend...do you know the Kings' proverb that revenge is a dish best served cold? It is very cold on the ice."
- Author: Species
- Tags: #chorus, #Import 2023-04-05 10:50

### Sharks@Penguins  
CBC & NBCSN  
8:00PM EDT

PAVELSKI: Crosby!  
CROSBY: You still remember, Captain. I cannot help but be touched. I, of course, remember you.  
PAVELSKI: What is the meaning of this attack? Where is the crew of the [Lightning](http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/teams/tampa-bay-lightning?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com)?  
CROSBY: Surely I have made my meaning plain. I mean to avenge myself upon you, Captain. I've deprived your team of chicken and pasta, and when I swing round, I mean to deprive you of your playoffs. But I wanted you to know first who it was who had beaten you.  
PAVELSKI: Crosby, ...if it's me you want, I'll have myself traded. Spare my team!  
CROSBY: I make you a counter-proposal; I will agree to your terms, ...if, ...if in addition to yourself, you hand over to me all data and material regarding the project called ... Auston Matthews.  
PAVELSKI: Auston Matthews, what's that?  
CROSBY: Don't insult my intelligence, Pavelski.  
PAVELSKI: Give me some time to recall the data from our scouts' computers.  
CROSBY: I give you sixty seconds, Captain.

PAVELSKI: Clear the locker room.

(whispering)  
THORNTON: At least we know he doesn't have Matthews.  
PAVELSKI: Keep nodding as though I'm still giving orders.  
 Mister Reimer, punch up the analytics of the [Penguins](http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/teams/pittsburgh-penguins?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) power play.  
REIMER: The Penguins' power play...  
PAVELSKI: Hurry!  
THORNTON: Their zone entries?  
PAVELSKI: It's all we've got.  
REIMER: The chart's up, sir.

CROSBY: Captain!  
PAVELSKI: We're finding it.  
CROSBY: Captain!  
PAVELSKI: Please, please ... give us time, ...the locker room is smashed, computers inoperative.  
CROSBY: Time is a luxury you don't have, Captain.  
PAVELSKI: Damn! (puts on glasses)  
CROSBY: Captain!  
PAVELSKI: It's coming through now, Crosby.

(whispering)  
THORNTON: The Penguins zone entry number is one six three zero nine.  
REIMER: I don't understand how sensitive controls could be encrypted with only a five digit number.  
PAVELSKI: You have to learn why things work in the NHL.  
THORNTON: We can't count very high.  
PAVELSKI: Which prevents an enemy team from doing we're attempting. Using our time out to order the Penguins to pull their goalies.  
THORNTON: Assuming he hasn't changed the combination. He's quite intelligent.

PAVELSKI: Crosby, how do I know you'll keep your word?  
CROSBY: Oh, I've given you no word to keep, Captain. In my judgment, you simply have no alternative.  
PAVELSKI: I see your point. Stand by to receive our transmission.

(whispering)  
PAVELSKI: Mister Marleau, lock pucks on target and await my command.  
MARLEAU: Pucks locked.

  
CROSBY: Time's up, Captain.  
PAVELSKI: Here it comes.  
Now, Mister Thornton.

\[Penguins locker room\]  
MALKIN: Sir! Our MAF is going to the bench!  
CROSBY: Send him back.  
MALKIN: I can't!  
CROSBY: Where's Murray? MURRAY?

\[[Sharks](http://www.sbnation.com/nhl/teams/san-jose-sharks?ref=pensionplanpuppets.com) locker room\]  
PAVELSKI: Fire!

\[Penguins locker room is exploding and on fire\]  
CROSBY: Shoot back! Shoot!  
MALKIN: We can't shoot, sir!  
CROSBY: Why can't you?  
MALKIN: They've damaged the Bonino-control and the Kessel run. We must withdraw.  
CROSBY: No! NOOOOOOOOO!  
MALKIN: We must!

### In tonight's game:

| Crosby will experience the "no win scenario"                                                                             | 3  |
| ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ | -- |
| Jones will sacrifice himself to save the Sharks                                                                          | 10 |
| The Penguins will hide in the Neutrala Zonula and use three-dimensional thinking to outwit the Sharks                    | 24 |
| The Sharks will pluck some slug-larva from Logan Couture and use them to mind control Kessel into turning over the puck. | 9  |
| The MAF will drop, and the Murray override will fail.                                                                    | 7  |