Good morning fans of the Toronto Maple Leafs™ presented by Scotiabank™! Last night I was drinking a delicious can of Slurm™ and eating a scrumptious pie from Pizza Planet™ while putting together a great bunch of news and links for you to read while you eat your healthy breakfast of Little Powdered Donuts™ and a big old bowl of Colon Blow™.
I was surfing the net and came across an article from the Daily Bugle™ about how the NHL™ is selling the naming rights to the new divisions?
That’s crazy. So I picked up my Valentine™ cellphone and called my buddy who was working at Mooby’s™ and told him about it. I was all “What if they put logos on the players next?” and he was all “Dude, they did. Check the Toronto Maple Leafs™ Twitter™ feed”
With the official start of training camp, we proudly announce Scotiabank as the team’s helmet partner for the 2020-21 season.— Toronto Maple Leafs (@MapleLeafs) January 4, 2021
Thank you @scotiabank for your continued support of the Maple Leafs and hockey in Canada. pic.twitter.com/UzTNGlUAfS
I couldn’t believe that those beautiful blue helmets would be marred by a white logo. No, not the big CCM™ logo on the front. The other one. At least they didn’t put the logo on the jersey, besides the Adidas™ logo that is.
I would never buy a jersey with a logo on it. Unless it’s the Fanatics™ logo on the bottom left of the front of the jersey. Sorry, I’m repeating myself, I already discussed my feelings about this.
In other news yesterday, I saw a tweet that just warmed my heart like a Fluffy Puff Marshmallow™ floating in a sea of Central Perk™ hot coco.
Boston kid Jimmy Vesey says he used to wear No. 19 growing up because Thornton was his favourite player.— Justin Cuthbert (@jccuthbert) January 5, 2021
Says he's been "trying not to act like an idiot around him" so far in camp.
A good question was posed. How many Toronto Maple Leafs™ will be on top of this list? Find out on EPSN 8: The Ocho™.
Can anyone top these 56-game point scoring stretches in the 2020-21 season? My ESPN+ piece on the season records players are chasing in this abbreviated campaign. https://t.co/AuRtIZxBJe pic.twitter.com/ybz3jj5fzf— Greg Wyshynski (@wyshynski) January 5, 2021
Denis Malgin was put on waivers by the Leafs™ yesterday. We’ll see if he clears or has to hop on an Oceanic Airlines™ flight back to North America to suit up for the Ottawa Senators™.
It was also day two of “Why Everyone Else in the Scotia NHL® North Division is bad” week. We focused all of our hatred on the former Atlanta Flames™ team.
Speaking of former Atlanta teams, the Winnipeg Jets* have yet to trade Patrick Laine, even though that is the only thing he wants in the world. That segue was brought to you by Segway™. Segway™ when you need to segue choose Segway™!
Maple Leafs™ training camp presented by Booty Sweat energy drink™ continued on:
“The energy and the vibe in the rink have been awesome.”— Toronto Maple Leafs (@MapleLeafs) January 5, 2021
Day 2 Media Mashup | #LeafsForever pic.twitter.com/9jcgUAIZI1
Centre of Leafs Nation™ had some thoughts on the upcoming season, aside from how much Dapper Dan Pomade™ this team will need with all their sick flows.
The gold medal game between Hockey Canada™ and USA Hockey™ was last night, so I fired up the old Corn Baller™ and grabbed a bag of Sabor De Soledad™ cheese puffs, a six pack of Alamo™ to watch the festivities. It was a great game full of tight plays, crazy antics, and other adjectives that show I didn’t write this before the first period ended.
Crazy that [country] defeated [country] by [score]!
After that crazy game I needed a stiff Flaming Moe™ to relax me.
Colin Wilson, drafted by the Nashville Predators™ by using a pick from the Maple Leafs™, retired yesterday after 11 NHL™ seasons.
If you need a laugh:
Further to @FriedgeHNIC post on Matt Martin's surprising new deal with #Isles:— Arthur Staple (@StapeAthletic) January 5, 2021
Hearing it's four years in the $1.5-million AAV range. Certainly would keep MM here for the rest of his NHL career.
Today in our “Suck it Lesser Canada” series, our focus moves to the Siberia of Canada, Edmonton. Home to a mall, and....another mall inside that mall.
Maple Leafs camp will continue, we’ll get more tweets from camp which I hope are just as adorable as today’s about Jimmy Vesey being a wee child watching team mate Joe Thornton play.
Enjoy your day today folks. I’ll be out delivering boxes of Nike Mags 2015™ and Bachelor Chow™, so keep an eye out for any news I missed.
Defending those plays like it's no big deal. Congratulations to @leijonat's Topi Niemela on being named the #WorldJuniors Best Defenceman! pic.twitter.com/FYEuBfnWRB— IIHF (@IIHFHockey) January 6, 2021