From The Branches

That's right, there will be zero Toskala discussion on the site, aside from this sentence of course, until 7PM. I'm searching for Leafs links; the site was down all night and we stop paying blurr overtime after five minutes of overtime because we're cheap

...then how come we're not laughing? Could it be due to the fact that there are eighty more game to go?  Let's all back away from the ledge, take a few deep breaths and ask ourselves:  "What the f*$# is going on?" Are the

For real yo, this little toaster is our ticket to 160 points this season. So then. Not the best start to the season, but fear not my timorous brethren. MLSE MegaCorp (in association with Zorin Industries) have been diligently beavering away in their research labs and are now ready to

Truly these are the salad days of hockey linkerage. The season is but two days old, the hopes and dreams of the masses are still fertile and fruitful and Carlo Colaiacovo isn't on the Injured Reserved list And still...well, and still we on the National Affairs desk

Look, I love Leafs fans. Three "Go Leafs Go" chants started on my walk from my car to the bar last night and high fives were given out like free candy from the back of Carey Price's van. There was a lot of good to see

Hockey. It starts tonight...(via torontoist.com) We're finally here. Opening night. When the season ended a scant 6 months or so ago, we'd seen a glimpse of Christian Hanson and been recently introduced to Tyler Bozak. However, since that time we've met Happy

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME HOCKEY?!? I KNOW I AM. I'M HAVING TROUBLE CONTROLLING THE SOUND..err, I'm having trouble controlling the sound of my voice, that is. Man oh man I am SO excited! I got my jersey over a sweet new Leafs tee, my

Did you sneak behind the Vesa's net and say not nice things? He sees you... * I'm not sure what to do now, as the man with all the answers, Dr. Steve, has a few questions of his own as the season is quickly closing in. * Oh

...and I'm carrying the Leafs. * Sports and the City is back writing about hockey, which must mean the boys of summer have gone.  Positivity personified, eyebleaf has an answer for the Leafs captain conundrum. * Kohma takes a rational approach to reviewing the final game of the pre-season,

Fade up to a grimy street corner at night, somewhere in North America in 2014. Enter hotshot investigative reporter, Guy Smiley. "Life on the streets. It's a tough world out here. Crime, narcotics, rum, sodomy and the lash." He encounters a strangely well-dressed man of

Goddammit! I want to see your war face Stajan! AAARRRGGGHHH! Jesus H. Christ! You maggots must be the worst bunch of low rent, white bread, no label, link seeking pukes I've ever set my eyes on! Get on the floor and give me fifty! That's push-

Ian White's Mustache wants to have pizza with Phil Kessel! (via corruptcamel.com) You may be asking yourself; "What does a mustache know about hockey?" Well, let's look at exhibit A. No, does nothing for ya? How about exhibit B? Still nothing!? Alright, let&

Carlton the Bear has 99 problems, but Phil Kessel ain't one. Whazzup gangstas? C to da B here, an me an muh ho's can't not wait ta gots Phunky Phresh Phil Kessel out on da ice, scoring go's fo da Leafs and

Welcome to the F***ing New and Bilingual PP to the M*********ing P! Ya, that's f***ing right I speak f***ing French you f***. I wanna f***ing welcome Phil f***ing Kessel to the f***ing Leafs. F***ing A! Right on! I f***ing

Mikhail Grabovski likes new Leaf Phil Kessel so much, he killed the Bruins mascot. Waka-waka! Hi-lo every persons. I, Mikhail Grabovski am welcoming you to join me very much at new, better PPP! At old PPP, much joking about pineapples, but at new Place of Philthy Phil, pineapples

This is how much Luke Schenn loves Phil Kessel. That's his sexy face... Hi folks, I'm Luke Schenn and I want to welcome you to the new and improved PPP, or Philthy Phil's Place. We've even got our own theme song! Phil

iMik is only one of the latest exciting iPhone Apps! Here on the National Affairs Desk, we like to keep abreast of current technological developments. Just because it's already two years old (and makes everyone within a 20 yard radius hate you to the grave) doesn't

Hellö everybödy ånd welcöme tö flåt påck, self-åssembly FTB, dåted Såturdåy September 19th. Pleåse tö be ensuring thåt yöu håve å cleån, well ventilåted spåce för this cönstructiön. Ensure nöt tö inhåle töö much funky glue, lest yöu end up like writing like Eyebleåf. Åre we reådy, super röck

I'm still giddy over the game.  Nasty Nazem Kadri looked ridiculous when given the proper tools to work with.  Niklas Hagman is still awesome (not that I had any doubts.)  Luke Schenn is still Luke Schenn, just a year older, wiser, stronger, meaner.  And not to belittle the

After watching the game last night, I had one thought: So that's what a good GM does. Years of ineptitude, which is far more painful to watch than mediocrity, had me convinced GM's just were not that important.  I was happy Burke signed on, but seeing

I've wasted the entire night playing the new EA Sports NHL 10 game, and by wasted I mean had a complete blast!  In fact, I'm having a hard time tearing myself away from it.  Let's get to the links so I can go back

* A shot from the Zambonic Youth, as mf37 reads "Leafs AbomiNation" so you don't have to. * The Cheap Seats claims to have read this same book, and enjoyed it. * The Goon's World brings a slightly less biased light to the Phil Kessel proceedings. * Michael

Mattblack is back in Her Majesty's Service and Blurr is in Vegas trying to turn PPP Amalgamated Heavy Industries third quarter revenues into a bankroll so I am here to kick off the work week with all the links that are fit to...link: * Get ready for NHL

Joseph Cotton is about to find out how things get done downtown. Attaboy! The sign on the frosted glass says 'Brian Burke - Private Detective'. That's me, BB - the sharp harp. Kidnapping, extortion, missing persons, fixing problems - you name it, it's my entire bag. References?

General Douglas MacArthur, Jesus, Bobby Ewing, the Ayatollah Khomenini….Curtis Joseph….and now me. Your chosen one has returned to the National Affairs Desk to lead you back to the land of milk and honey – limited supplies of Ambrosia will be available for the lactose intolerant. * My esteemed colleague mf37